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The Difference Between Never Wanting To Settle And Simply Being A Picky Perfectionist

I have a problem… it's a curse, really. No matter how hard I try, I always seem to find something wrong with the guy I'm dating. It's either the way he appears to be a few inches shorter than I am or his constant texting after just one date. Whatever it is, I always seem to find a flaw.

Society has made it possible for us to constantly be in search of the “perfect” guy: the guy in movies, who is charming yet awkward and just so happens to own a horse-drawn carriage or something.

This disease of pickiness has slowly but surely swept the nation and has no apparent cure.

Girls everywhere are enjoying first dates but never getting a second because of the Disney effect. You know, that closely held belief that Prince Charming is out there somewhere.

We see it at the end of every movie: The girl falls madly in love with the so-called “perfect” guy. This concept has continued to influence women everywhere into believing that these unrealistic fairytales are actually real.

I'm not saying there's no possibility of this happening, but for the most part, Prince Charming won’t just come to you. You have to work to attain that type of relationship. I do, however, agree that we are at some fault because our list of expectations in a partner seems truly endless.

Many of us expect a lot at the start of a relationship, but is it fair for us to write a guy off just because he forgets to open the door?

Our generation is into the no-strings-attached hook-up culture and forgets what it's like to actually go on a date. Are we, ourselves, to blame for this phenomenon of being too picky?

I often wonder whether my expectations are too high. Should I just accept the fact that not everyone's perfect and settle for what I have? Or, am I being insensitive by investing my time in a relationship that I know isn't what I'm looking for?

This picky curse is omnipresent and stretches to life's minutiae, like debating over which toothpaste to buy.

What happened to living a little and letting our lives play out in ways we couldn't expect? We must give ourselves the chance to enjoy new and beautiful experiences; ones we never thought could have existed if we didn't decide to venture outside of our own comfort zones.

Last year, Jezebel ran an article that examined pickiness and linked it to our overall “unwillingness to open the mind to other things we might find displeasing at first.”

The way we are attracted to a particular “type” can often lead us to miss out on someone who may be a soul mate just because of the way he dresses, or something else trivial.

The bottom line is that there's a difference between settling and being too picky. Don't ever settle for someone who makes you change who you are, but do give someone a chance if his biggest flaw is something as trivial as sleep talking.

Stop devoting your life to finding your Prince Charming. Open your eyes to the bigger picture and realize that every person has flaws.

If we can learn to accept some of these imperfections, we may find our other half in someone we never expected to love.

Photo Courtesy: Tumblr

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Nicole Germany

Contributor

Nicole is a contributing writer who lives for snapping photos of her cat Blaire and finds it difficult to rate anything 5 stars on yelp. Follow her adventures on Instagram: @nikkilesss
Nicole is a contributing writer who lives for snapping photos of her cat Blaire and finds it difficult to rate anything 5 stars on yelp. Follow her adventures on Instagram: @nikkilesss

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