People may think alcohol is the destroyer of all relationships. But to those people, I say: If you can drink together, you can do anything together.
Alcohol may fuel ridiculous arguments and bring out sides you’d never think you’d see, but for those reasons, it’s exactly why couples who drink together, stay together.
If alcohol is what is causing problems in your relationship, then maybe your foundation wasn’t as strong as you thought it was.
Because what happens when real sh*t happens in life — like illness or death? That’s the true test of a relationship, not your partying habits.
So how does drinking together reinforce your relationship? Well…
1. Neither of you will remember what you were fighting about in the morning
If you can’t remember, it doesn’t count, right? Isn’t that the number one unwritten rule about drinking? It better be or I’ve been doing it wrong all these years…
2. You get all of your arguing out when you’re drunk
There’s nothing even to argue about when you finally sober up. Regardless if you remember what was actually said, you’ve already gotten the release you needed.
3. You’re always honest with each other
Your inhibitions are thrown out the window when the two of you start drinking. There’s no need to sugarcoat anything because you both are on the same page.
4. You learn to take care of each other
There’s nothing like the bond that is created when your boyfriend is stuck holding your hair up as you throw up the entire contents of your stomach. Bonus points if he makes out with you afterwards.
5. You work together to manipulate people into buying you drinks
Divide and conquer is the plan you both know is in place without even having to speak about it out loud. There’s nothing people love more than when couples get sh*tfaced together.
6. You couldn’t keep a secret if you tried
As “Mean Girls” taught us, word vomit is a real thing that only gets worse when you drink.
7. If you both act embarrassing, you can’t judge each other
There’s no worse feeling than waking up from a blackout next to your partner with absolutely no recollection of the previous night.
But you know what the best feeling is? That your SO is just as confused as you are!
8. You don’t argue about money because you’re both spending it on the same thing
Each of you alternate who buys the rounds until you don’t even know whose turn it is anymore.
At that point, you don’t even f*cking care because you are beyond the point of any rational decision-making.
9. You don’t get jealous because you’re out together
When you are getting drunk with your partner, no one else even matters.
All you care about is getting as drunk as possible and heading home as early as possible… you catch my drift.
10. You have a hangover camaraderie
If there’s any good aspect of a hangover it’s that you have someone to take care of you.
There’s nothing more miserable than lying in bed in the fetal position with no one to rub your back for you.
11. You can have hungover, high sex in the morning
Sex can cure headaches and hangovers. No, I didn’t just make that up either — science proves it! And everyone knows weed just helps the process.
12. You never argue about what you’re going to do on a Friday night
There’s no “Are we staying in or going out?” debate when it comes to your relationship. You know exactly what kind of sh*t you’re getting into come the weekend.
13. Your days off from partying are the same
When you do finally want to chill out, chances are your partner is more than down for a night of relaxation.
14. Drunk eating is a holiday for the two of you
Thanksgiving ain’t got sh*t on the feasts you and your SO indulge in after a night on the town. People aren’t sure if they should be impressed or disgusted at your actions.
15. You are both as equally f*cked up at any given moment
And thank God for that or you’d be putting up with the other’s behavior for much longer.
16. You’re never skeptical of what your partner is doing
No one’s more fun than you and vice versa. There’s no jealousy in this relationship; you’re both too busy having fun.
17. All of your friends automatically love your partner
Anyone who parties with his or her SO’s friends automatically gets the seal of approval. There’s nothing worse than people who keeps their partners away from their friends.
18. There are so many options when it comes to activities
You have, on more than one occasion, gone on a two person bar tour.
19. Your relationship is never boring
There is always something for the two of you to do, which is why you are everyone’s favorite people to drink and hang out with.
20. You’ve seen each other at your worst many times
And you love each other even more for it!
21. You look good every time you’re drinking together
You may go out looking like a power couple, but when you wake up, it’s an entirely different story.
22. …And you both look like sh*t in the morning, but couldn’t care less
It’s what makes the relationship so fun, fresh and funny.
23. Everything you do is an adventure
Because it always involves a flask and a party.
24. Your SO appreciates brunch as much as you do
The only way to prevent the full hangover from setting in is by drinking more. Your partner firmly believes this as do you, which is why you make the perfect pair.
25. You have an activity planned for every day of the week
When in doubt… pour one out. Or two, no one’s judging here.
26. You both know the best way to get through family functions
You actually have even grown to enjoy them; I guess anything is tolerable if you don’t have to do it solo.
27. You’d rather take shots together than at each other
While other couples are throwing low blows at one another, the only thing you and your significant are throwing back are tequila shots.
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