Relationships

5 Deep Questions To Ask A Girl If You Think You Might Be Into Each Other

by Cosmo Luce
Guille Faingold

Flirting is never straightforward, but especially not when you're not certain if a girl you're talking to is into you as friends or something more. When you're better at talking around your feelings than laying it all out, it's good to have some deep questions to ask a girl when you think you might like each other. It allows the two of you to grow closer naturally and to feel your way toward whether your crush can turn into something more. And while asking your crush these questions might make your tummy swoop with nervousness, they also save you from having to blurt out your feelings outright. There, doesn't that make you less nervous?

When you ask your queer crush these questions, you're not only taking their temperature, but you're seeing whether they're in the same world as you are — or if they want to get closer to you at all. I often think of being queer as kind of existing within a flipped dimension, where your feelings are fluid and flow from one container to the next. Asking your girl crush these questions gauges whether you both are on the same page, whether she is still standing on the threshold, or if she's simply not that into you after all.

1. What Do You Think That Person Over There Is Thinking Right Now?

The deep questions to ask a girl to make her feel close to you are basically those that invite her into a shared fantasy. This question has the lightest touch of flirtation, but it is also the perfect way to figure out what's going on in her mind. It turns the two of you into spectators who are people watching together; the rest of the crowded bar or room is your stage. Becoming two flies on the wall is the quickest way to develop a bond, while also giving you both an opportunity to make one another laugh. What could be cuter?

2. What Are The Best Ways To Flirt With Another Girl?

I recommend leaning in closely to your crush to ask her this question. It's great to ask because it has two implications. First, it gives you some flirtation strategies that you know she'll pick up on. It also lets you feel out whether or not she has explored queerness before or if she even identifies as queer.

If you're shy, this deep question also gives you a great buffer. If your crush recoils, you can always say that you were asking because you have feelings for another girl. Even though it subtly puts your feelings out there on the table, it isn't without opportunities to reel them back in. Chances are, though, it'll make your crush giggle and give you another shared bonding experience.

3. What's The Difference Between Being Friends And Falling In Love?

I'd venture to guess that every queer girl has fallen in love with one of her close friends before, probably to varying degrees of heartbreak. If you're searching for deep questions to ask a girl you're crushing on, this one is great because it implies that there might be something more to your connection. It gives her the opportunity to take your connection one step further in her response.

This deep question also allows you to feel out your crush's boundaries. Is hooking up with friends strictly off limits to her? Can she ever be friends again with someone after she falls in love with them? Learning about the patterns someone applies to their relationships gives you great insight into their inner emotional world. Plus, it gives you some idea of what you can expect if things do work out between you two.

4. What's The Worst Thing About Having A Crush On Someone?

Honestly, I feel like giving myself a pat on the back for coming up with this question. It's probably the most perfect question you could ever ask anyone — guy or girl — whom you might be into. It creates an opportunity for humor and basically shows her that you are open if she wants to put on the moves. At the same time, it gives her a way to back out of taking things further with her response. If she quickly starts talking about someone else she has feelings for, then that gives you your answer. Your feelings might be hurt, but your dignity will stay intact.

There's no deeper question that better alludes to the fact that you have feelings for someone without coming right out and saying it. If she's warm when she gives her response and asks what the worst thing about having a crush is for you, then you can heavily imply that your crush is the very person you are talking to without having to be too direct — because we all know that being too direct kills that nice, simmering sexual tension.

5. How Can You Tell When A Girl Likes You Back?

If you're still searching for crush-related deep questions to ask a girl, then this one is the final question you need to absolutely, unquestioningly figure out whether or not she likes you back. If she's into you, you can probably bet that she will go so far as to do some of the very things she's talking about when she gives her response. (Is there anything cuter than her initiating touch while telling you that physical contact is the best way to tell whether someone likes you back?)

Honestly, the best deep questions to ask a girl when you might be into one another is to ask her how she responds to the very thing you are going through. It creates an instant emotional bond and mental intimacy between you two, and it allows you to pick up strongly on her vibes without making any assumptions. Once you've figured out where she stands, then you can actually begin to make a move. Just be sure you don't sell yourself short on all that fun, flirty tension that's there for you both to enjoy first.

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