The Brutally Honest Phases Of A Man Falling In Love

The Brutally Honest Phases Of A Man Falling In Love
Gentlemen
Like Us On Facebook
Like Us On Facebook

We all, men and women alike, might feel the same emotions when it comes to love, but the journey to finding love is an experience differentiated by gender. When women fall in love, they are filled with bursts of happiness and other mixed emotions, which a man will never be able to comprehend. Men on the other hand, are a completely different ballgame.

You see, unlike women who experience intense surges of affection as soon as they meet a guy, men experience a phase of emotions when they meet a woman. This article will explain the phases and journey a man undergoes before falling in love with a woman.

Phase 1. The “I Like You” Phase

tumblr_le1vdp4Fxo1qcbngro1_500

Unfortunately, men are very shallow creatures. This initial stage is all about instant physical attraction. If you ever thought a guy initially liked you as a person …oh boy, were you wrong!  Some women may fall in love during the first conversation, but sadly, in the beginning stages, men are only attracted to a woman’s physical appearance.  Don’t be fooled by the idea of a ‘physical appearance.’

It does not include the whole package. Every man is different and enjoys different things about a woman. For example, most men are attracted by breasts (may it be small or large) and also by your curvy behind (again, may it be small or large). It’s never about the whole package, but more about a man’s specific appeal in a woman. Sometimes, a guy may not even realize what attracts him most in a woman, but if he has such feelings, he will begin the “I Like You” phase.


Phase 2. The Scouting Phase

Most guys find themselves attracted to a lot of women for many reasons, and as a result, they will “scout” to see which one of them will respond to their advances. Yes, men try to bait as many women as we can, at any given time. It’s only when a girl has passed the “scouting” phase (by accepting our small advances) that a man begins to focus his attention only on her.

These advances are very discreet and are not upfront flirting. A man basically needs that little confirmation that if he does start to chase you, something will happen. Even though he likes a woman, in this stage, he doesn’t really care about the outcome, so if she rejects him or doesn’t respond to his advances, he generally doesn’t feel a thing and moves on to another woman that catches his attention. Sure, there are exceptions, but generally, this is how guys think at this point.


Phase 3. The Chase

tumblr_mbu6323nyw1ry00mpo1_500

If a woman a man likes gives even the slightest positive response to his advances, he will start the chase. Sometimes those signs aren’t even obvious; he just believes in himself that you like him back, and as a result, he starts the chase. The chase is all about winning your attention. In this stage, a man’s aim is to get you to notice him and understand that he’s into you. Once this has become clear, and you have given him a shot (by agreeing to go out with him, etc.), he moves into the next phase.


Phase 4. The “I’m Going To Impress You” Phase

By this time, some women are actually starting to fall in love, but us men are not even close to it. This whole stage is all about making an impression on you. A man will do everything in his power to show you that he is a worthy mate. He plans dates; he floods you with gifts, and generally tries to make you happy whilst hoping to really impress you. It’s in this stage that many women (that have held out, until now) give in to a guy’s advances.


Phase 5. The “I Want You To Love Me” Phase

bokeh-converse-couple-green-holding-hands-love-Favim.com-88397

If a guy is having success so far, he wants to know that you love him. Gaining your love and commitment is his utmost highest achievement. Instead of falling in love with you, in this stage, all he worries about is how to make you fall in love with him. He might even show his relationship skills, thus proving that he is, indeed, a good lifelong partner. You might have already fallen in love by this stage, but this is when he needs to see it.


Phase 6. The Decision Phase

If a man makes it into this stage, it means you’ve clearly expressed your feelings, and he knows that he has managed to gain your love and commitment. Now, unfortunately, for both parties involved, all he did up to this point was prove to you that he is “exactly” what you are looking for in a man.

Because of this, two core problems arise:

-He wasn’t actually being himself 100 percent, so the man you’ve fallen in love with isn’t exactly the man you think he is.

-He never wondered if you’re actually right for him, since his desire to impress you was based purely on his INITIAL physical attraction.

It’s at this phase when a man finally starts to wonder if a real relationship may blossom here. It’s at this point when he starts to actually observe you as a real person (and I know this may sound shallow) and see if he actually likes you in this department. Finally, it’s at this stage when a man decides if you are worth trying a long-term relationship with. We ask ourselves: Do I love her? Do I want to be with her? Will I be happy with her? Is she the woman I want?

It’s easy for a man, even at this stage, to dismiss a girl based on some seemingly pointless reasons, but it’s how we are as a species. We are genetically engineered to “spread thy seed,” so the girl that a man does eventually decide to love and be with has to be perfect from his perspective. It’s also the same for a woman …the only difference is that she probably makes up her mind much earlier in the relationship.


Phase 7. The “I Love You” Phase

tumblr_ltv8u9Fz0H1qcsjiso1_500_large

If the decision stage was negative, it’s at this stage when the guy will either dump you if you had a short relationship, or start ignoring you if it was just a fling. On the other hand, if he decided he does want to give love a try, he is now ready for it. The next three to four months will be the best stages of any relationship. He will give into his feelings and be overwhelmed with love. You will start to see him taking care of you, acting jealous and all the other great things about love.

It may seem harsh and unrealistic that a guy has to DECIDE whether or not he wants to fall in love, but we don’t always rationalize what we are doing. These things are imbedded into us at an instinctual level, and the fact that we DENY love early in these phases is only because it’s our defense mechanism preventing us from getting hurt.

Important Note: This is how a man falls in love if the woman he is after gives into all of his advances. If you want to turn a guy on his head, don’t give in to ALL OF HIS advances. Don’t say, “I love you” when he wants you to say it. Basically, turn his world upside down, and then, you’ll see a man falling helplessly in love, not being able to control his own emotions.

This is the sort of content I discuss on my blog and in my free eBook. If you want to increase your love life success, visit TheSingleWomanGuide.com – a place where the “conventional dating mindset” is thrown out the window in favor of more direct and fruitful methods of meeting, attracting and keeping a quality man in your life.

Share Tweet
React

Alex Matlock

Alex Matlock is an expert in dating and relationships. Apart from working on his Ph.D. in social psychology and writing for EliteDaily.com, he also owns two dating advice websites. Both are places where the "dating" mindset is thrown out the window in favor of more direct (and fruitful) methods of succeeding with the opposite sex. If you’re a man and want to increase your success with women, visit http://ThePlayerGuide.com. If you’re a woman and want to improve your love life’s success, visit http://TheSingleWomanGuide.com.

More In Gentlemen

Gentlemen Joe Welkie

Why Good Guys Need To Expect More From Modern Women

Living in New York has enlightened me to many things about the world. One, people don’t seem to give a crap about the homeless. Two, you can’t use a restroom in this city without buying something. And three, too many good men are settling for lesser women. Now, before you go off on your tangent about […]

Gentlemen Katie Doyle

5 Ways For American Men To Appeal To The Well-Traveled Woman

Boys: Can’t live with ‘em, can’t live without ‘em… especially the homegrown American ones, as full of sex appeal as they might be. Luke Bryan, anyone? Even our “Super Bass” idol, Nicki Minaj, admits she’s “really got a thing for American guys.” However, their European counterparts are beating these local boys at many aspects of […]

Gentlemen Paul Hudson

The Lost Art: 10 Gentlemanly Acts That Men Need To Bring Back

There’s a myth that is perpetuated in the modern world: Gentleman can’t exist because women are capable of taking care of themselves. We all know that women can take care of themselves just fine. That’s not why men should be gentlemen. Men should go that extra mile for one simple reason: It makes (or at […]

Gentlemen Paul Hudson

10 Things Men Need To Start Doing To Become Gentlemen Again

The world works in funny ways. I blame it on mankind’s zealous oversimplification of complex problems. When we discover that a part of our culture is flawed, if we find that the way things are is not ideal, we label it as wrong, making a 180-degree turn in the opposite direction. Take, for example, the […]

Also On Elite

News

Digital Currency Gains Momentum Worldwide, This Time In Iceland

When the economy goes to sh*t, just invent your own digital currency! At least, that’s the idea behind Auroracoin, a digital currency that just emerged in Iceland. A person or group of people released this cyber currency on the web under the pseudonym Baldur Friggjar Óðinsson. The aim is a ploy to decentralize economic power in […]

TV

Get Ready For ‘Girl Meets World’ With Its Very First Trailer

OH. MY. GOD. If you thought you were excited for the “Boy Meets World” spinoff, “Girl Meets World,” just wait until you watch this new teaser trailer. “Teaser” being the operative word, since the clip is only a total 0f 30 seconds, but that is just enough time to have all our wonderful and joyous […]