Relationships

The New Chivalry: A Real Prince Charming Always Lets You Finish First

by Gigi Engle

Contrary to what many are quick to sputter with violent ferocity, chivalry is not dead, my friends.

No, it is not destroyed, lost or broken; a “gentleman” is not an antiquated notion that should be left to generations prior.

The chivalrous gentleman still exists. The idea of a Prince Charming has not dwindled; it has not left our hearts.

It is the definition of chivalry that has altered.

Chivalry used to mean holding the door open, buying us flowers, putting us on a pedestal and basically just treating all women like we are princesses.

That definition of the word “chivalry” has been swept aside for a more practical version that better fits into the societal mold we Millennials have been arduously constructing.

Men and women are equals. We’re all working hard and making that cash. Both men and women alike are dominating the workforce and demanding sweeping reforms in work-life balance.

We’re working to build a balanced playing ground in every aspect of life.

Not even attitudes around sex have gone unreformed or unquestioned.

We’ve made extensive leaps in the realm of sexuality and have come to accept it as a natural act that is in no way deserving of shame.

We’re finally recognizing sex is not just for making little rug-rat babies, but that it can, in fact, be primarily used for pleasure. We own that fact with pride.

Women are sexual beings. We’re sexually liberated, and moreover, we’re sexual equals to men.

Sex is not about only pleasing men; it is about pleasing two separate people through one conjoined act.

Therefore, the definition of chivalry is no longer an overarching umbrella devoted to the protection of the dainty female, but is now geared toward the man who treats a woman as an honored equal.

What better place to be a true gentleman than in the boudoir? What better way to show respect and gallantry than to let a woman finish before you? We both are entitled to sexual gratification.

The real Prince Charming is the one who tends to your body’s needs before focusing on his own. Nice guys finish last (and that’s a good thing).

Only a complete assh*le would get off without making sure you get off, too.

If a man doesn’t make the effort to make sure you have an orgasm before he comes, he is not a man who is worthy of your time.

His attentiveness (or lack thereof) in bed speaks volumes about him.

A man who doesn’t care about whether or not you finish is a complete tool.

If he can’t even satisfy you in bed, you can bet he isn’t going to satisfy you anywhere else.

Your pleasure is equally as important to his.

You know you’ve found a winner when he treats your pleasure as equal to his. The true Prince Charming is perceptive to your body’s needs and makes sure you are taken care of before he is.

Forget slaying dragons and rescuing a woman from an isolated tower -- a real knight in shining armor is rescuing a woman from selfish lovers and delivering orgasms up like the spoils of war.

It’s just unnatural for a guy to finish first.

If a guy finishes, and you don’t, that’s it. It’s over. The sex is caput.

We’re living in an age where we finally recognize sex is about both people. Therefore, both people should climax before the act is complete.

If your man gets off before you, it just isn’t the natural progression of things. It’s not like he can keep going once he’s finished. A true gentleman knows his lady needs to get where she needs to be if he’s planning to get where he needs to be.

If he doesn’t go down, don’t keep him around.

Oral sex is a pivotal component to any healthy relationship. If your man does not treat your body like it is a shrine to which he should wholeheartedly (and whole-mouthed-ly) worship, he is a scrub.

He should be eager to get you off any way he can. Failure is not an option. He's a hero, after all.

The real Prince Charming is the one who heads downtown not only willingly but also with unabashed, overjoyed excitement. As I’ve said, if you loved me, you’d lick me. End of story.

That is the true end to a fairy tale. I want all of my fairy tales to end with an orgasm.

He should love every inch of your body.

Your man should be in awe of every single inch of you. He should be mesmerized, enamored and appreciative of your entire body. When you get between the sheets, making you climax should be his absolute mission.

He should make you feel treasured, secure and sexy. Real chivalry is when a man makes you feel like the unapologetic sexual goddess you are.

If he’s good in bed, he’s probably good at life.

As Samantha Jones once famously said:

“I’ve never met a man who was bad in bed and was good in life.”

And right she was! If he isn’t making moves in the bedroom, you can guess he probably isn’t making moves in the boardroom either.

I assure you if he’s weak, selfish or unassertive in bed, all of these qualities will be magnified in other areas of his life as well.

He should get gratification from making you feel satisfied.

Turning his woman on turns on a real man. It should make him hot to know he is getting you hot. Your man should want to make your body feel as amazing as he possibly can.

He should find more joy in watching you squirm than he gets from getting off. The real Prince Charming is a climax kingpin. He’ll always put you first.

Give a girl a good orgasm, and she’s yours for life.

Getting a girl off is really hard, so if you manage to do that, you’re a champion. We ladies often think with our vaginas before our heads, so if he can get in good with the lady downstairs, he’ll have you wrapped around his finger.

Sex isn’t everything. Good sex isn’t the only thing that makes happy relationships, but it sure does help. A lot. Immeasurably.