Have you been with a guy that acts like he is your boyfriend, but still tells you he isn’t ready for a relationship?
He somehow does everything he is supposed to do, the perfect boyfriend. He calls consistently. He takes you out every weekend. On the outside, he seems like a dream come true, yet something doesn’t feel right. It’s not what he’s doing but what he’s not doing that starts to get to you.
When a man says he is not ready for a relationship, your best bet is to believe him.
Men that tell you they aren’t ready for a relationship are really telling you that they want to keep their options open. We, as women, make excuses for these men. We tell ourselves that he is too busy with work, school or he has too much going on in his life. Whatever the case may be, any guy who wants to be with you will make it clear that he does.
He proudly introduces you to his family but claims you two are “just friends.” Hell, he might even hold your hand and kiss you in public but refuse to hang around once the date and the sex is over. I know it may not seem like a big deal to not want to lay around on the couch after a great night and talk about how much fun it was, but it’s the little things that matter most in these situations.
It’s the little things that separate this great guy from “Mr. Right.” He doesn’t do little things just for the sake of doing them, like bringing you flowers, stopping by with your favorite chocolates, bringing you soup when you’re sick, or just coming over because he can’t wait to see you. These little things are obviously missing.
He will keep your lives separate on most levels. He picks which parts you are included in. This gives him the power to dictate the terms and conditions of your relationship and there isn’t much you can do about it unless you leave. I suggest you think hard about a man like this. These are the guys that will wake up one day and say “It’s not you, it’s me”, or “I am not ready for a relationship”.
When a man tells you he is not ready for a relationship, believe him because he is doing you a favor by being honest. There is no sense in trying to force something that is already not panning out like it should. Maybe he has unresolved issues.
Maybe he hasn’t dealt with his past or healed from old wounds yet. Who cares? A man who is not ready for a relationship is of no use at all to you, unless you enjoy emotional abuse. Get rid of him immediately. Tell him thanks for the wonderful time spent, but you are ready to be more than a toy and since you want more out of the chemistry than he seems to, it’s time to walk away.
Easier said than done, I know, but really, you are risking your heart on a man that is not willing to give his own in return.
Juliette Nanikashvili | Elite.