Social networks are revolutionizing how we stay connected to others, but they’re also tearing us apart.
Facebook is the not-so-silent slayer of the Millennial relationship. When our grandparents started dating, there wasn’t any pressure to make it “Facebook official” and ex-boyfriends and booty calls weren’t just a click away.
Some studies show that new couples are having a tough time even staying together, haunted by the ghosts of scandalous tagged photos and posts from single life. And that is just the beginning.
Once the seeds of jealousy have been planted, Facebook’s platform breeds paranoia.
Whether it’s innocently checking out the “randoms” that commented on your partner’s latest profile photo, or stalking exes on Instagram, one thing leads to another and soon enough, you’re infiltrating boyfriend or girlfriend’s inbox with jealous questions.
While these actions may only happen in cyberspace, they can have irreparable damage on real life connections.
Does this sound all too familiar? We’ve all been there. Here are the best ways to save a relationship from the penultimate destruction of Facebook.
Remember: It’s Not Real
It’s important to remember exactly what Facebook is: a f*cking website. Wikipedia describes Facebook as an “online social networking service” and sometimes our generation forgets that’s all it is.
Treat Facebook as a way to stay in touch with friends, but don’t let it take over your life and wreak havoc on personal relationships. Letting a website come between loved ones is just silly.
Sit down with your partner and come up with guidelines for how you expect each other to act on social media. It may sound silly, but it’s better than having a falling out over it.
It may take trimming exes from the friend list or agreeing not to answer the messages of desperate exes, but try to find a common ground and stick to it.
No matter the temptation, creeping through your boyfriend or girlfriend’s private messages is never going to make you feel better.
In fact, you’re almost always going to find something that you don’t like, which leads to anger and jealousy. Do yourself a favor and just don’t even go there.
Think Before You Click
According to one study, Facebook’s biggest danger to relationships is how easy it is to reconnect with former lovers, creating a constant fear of emotional and physical cheating.
On the Internet, it’s easy to make thoughtless decisions quickly, but taking that extra second to understand consequences can avoid a lot of heartache.
Chatting with other dudes after a fight isn’t the right way to deal. In fact, it’s going to lead to even bigger problems later on.
Scale Back Facebook Time
This may sound extreme, but the answer may be for both you and your partner to spend less time on Facebook altogether. Some couples even opt out of being on each other’s friend list and newsfeed.
Look at it this way: We’ve all been guilty of wasting hours on Facebook. That time is better spent making a romantic dinner or planning an afternoon outing for two, anyway.
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