Time and time again people make the mistake of trying to defy the basic laws of science and believing that it is actually possible for a guy and a girl to be just “friends” and nothing else.

Women love to think it is possible and even claim that it is their duty to make sure no “boundaries” are crossed between them and their male friends who they don’t sleep with but somehow care about so much. Men simply don’t care because the only thing they are looking for when they are friends with a woman is sex.

The saddest thing about all of this is that women are still under the impression that men are mature enough to have pure intentions of just being friends, only spending time with them just do to “friendly” activities. Coming from a man’s perceptive, we couldn’t care less about being your friend.

What we consider a friend is someone who likes to watch football on Sundays, play video games and help us pick up women. Think about it, what the hell can men and women possibly do together as friends that two men or two women couldn’t? Take walks? Have coffee? Talk on the phone? I think I just threw up in my mouth.

Men are simple-minded in terms of what we want from the women in our lives. Women can’t understand a mentality as simple as this because their own is so incredibly complicated. The minds of men and women just clash due to the inability to relate and enjoy the beauty of our differences.

Women will never understand men and we sure as hell will never understand women, so how can you possibly call two people who will never understand the way the other person thinks “friends?” Then there’s the issue of those god damn periods. Unless a man is confined to the chains of marriage or a long-term relationship, no dude should ever have to deal with a woman on her period. Especially if she doesn’t even sleep with him. It’s just not fair.

We are not stupid and we are not going to waste our time being friends with a girl for no reason. We’re not trying to reach new levels of compassion or depth or connection or anything like that, because we need an actual intimate romantic relationship to do anything of the sort.

The only reason a man ever befriends a woman is for one reason and one reason only, that is of course sex. We could care less what your best friend did to you or about your new pair of 1,000 dollar shoes. That is just not within any parameters of our interest.

Sure you can call us shallow, but welcome to understanding a man. We call girls crazy but they just say “welcome to understanding a woman.”  The only reason we even waste words on a female and open our mouths to them is in hope to one day bang them.

Why? Because it works and it does actually happen. The trick is pretend to be her friend and wait for the moment she is most vulnerable, usually right after she breaks up with someone or that random night where you two are gloriously wasted.

Besides, even if she doesn’t give it up right away doesn’t mean we’ll resort to just being friends. If we really want to sleep with you and feel you are worth the wait, don’t mistake all the time we spend with you for harmless friendship. We will never, ever give up if you’ve got that special something.

There are girls that are even labeled as “friend fuckers” because they are infamous for getting caught up with their male friends and eventually giving in and banging them. And look at that, now she has men who will actually listen to her talk and want to spend time with her outside the bedroom? Funny how that works, I wonder if anyone else has gotten the picture.

Men relate to these women because when we are close with someone of the opposite sex, we immediately feel that it wouldn’t be right not to sleep with them. Women somehow have the uncanny ability to truly care for a man without wanting to sleep with him. What this feels like is extremely puzzling to most men.

Women are like the Dow Jones, their emotions and looks go up and down with extreme hostility. Just to put things in perceptive, do you think any guy on planet earth would ever be friends with an ugly girl? No, we only befriend hot girls to try to bang them and if that doesn’t work out we try to move over into her girlfriends. There is a strategy to this, just like trading stocks and most men engage in this process all the time.

Studies have even proven that men are more likely to think that their opposite sex friends are attracted to them. Men were also a lot more sexually attracted to their opposite sex friend than the females were.  In fact, men’s estimates of how attractive they were to their female friends had virtually nothing to do with how these women actually felt, and almost everything to do with how the men themselves felt.

Basically, males assumed that any romantic attraction they experienced was mutual, and were blind to the actual level of romantic interest felt by their female friends. Women, too, were blind to the mindset of their opposite-sex friends. Because females generally were not attracted to their male friends, they assumed that this lack of attraction was mutual.

No surprise there. As a result, men consistently overestimated the level of attraction felt by their female friends and women consistently underestimated the level of attraction felt by their male friends.

This is where the great misunderstanding occurs, hence it is impossible for men and women to be friends. Men who are aware of how pointless it is to be friends with a woman will eventually give up on the friendship altogether if their not seeing any perks or value or sex signals from it.

Any girl that is friends with a guy should ask themselves this question: If you gave a guy a chance to sleep with you, would the guy do it or would he “respect the boundaries of friendship” and not try to ruin what you two had? Absolutely not, we will jump in there before she finishes giving us the permission to do so.

Women are inconsiderate and don’t care about what us men really want. The problem is that they have placed way too much value on sex when it’s actually not even that symbolic of who you are as a person. It sells on craigslist for pretty cheap. But we as men love the challenge. That’s why every time we meet a lady, we usually let her know right off the bat that we aren’t looking to just be friends.

It may get you rejected but at least it saved you the pain of having your manhood stripped from you by being subjected to the torturous nightmare known as the “friend-zone.”

Women have emotions and once the friendship boundary is crossed, they fall in love because they think everything was meant to be and you two already know each other so well, so why not? Doesn’t work that way, ladies. We’ve already gotten all we could ever want from you, so now it’s done, done, onto the next one.

Preston Waters | Elite.