The human race is an interesting assortment of creatures. While we are all basically identical in our core fundamentals- especially when discussing our physical attributes- we also differ greatly in virtually every aspect of our psychological build.

There are, however, certain instances where the entire human race mirrors the same psychological tendencies. There is one tendency in particular that I have in mind- one that I was only able to truly grasp after the world’s most recent literary phenomenon: 50 Shades Of Grey. Here it is, my great epiphany: At the innermost core of every person on this planet lies a slumbering, insatiable nymphomaniac.

Not so surprised? That’s probably because your inner nymphomaniac has been awoken some time ago and has been running rampant ever since. Not everyone is so lucky. For the rest of those that have yet to meet their better, more exciting half- I promise you, that little devil is in there. We have all heard the male stereotype that every man is after one thing and one thing only, sex.

Well, that’s true. But I realized something after several weeks of riding the 6 train and watching women of all shapes and ages reading, rather living, E. L. James’ literary pornography; women- all women- are just as sexual as men. And what’s even better, because most of them have been keeping their inner-freak tame, now that many of them have let lose, they are all starving.

But I digress. I’m not writing this article to share with you my joy from realizing that I now have an endless variety of kinky females to play with. I’m writing this article in hopes that those of you that have yet to unleash your bad side will come to realize that you will be better off doing so; it’s only natural.

Let’s look at this from a biological standpoint. Human beings are the most evolved living things on this planet. We surpass each and every other living thing in terms of intellect- but nevertheless, we are, and will always remain, just animals.

Our survival depends on one thing and one thing alone: procreation. In order to keep the race going we must reproduce. That’s what animals do. They mate, and they mate often. We are biologically structured in a way where we feel a naturally need to, pardon my French, fuck.

So why in the world are we suppressing this urge? I’m not necessarily speaking of going around and sleeping with anything that walks on two legs; but if you are already going to get down and dirty, why not really get down and dirty? Why not bring out the chains, whips, and oils and play dungeon?

Why wait until you get home and comfortable? Find a somewhat hidden corner and let loose. Get together with some of your closest friends (or maybe not so close friends) and skip the Wednesday night movie- have an orgy instead.

This is the 21st century and for all we know the world really may end in two weeks. There’s no time to waste behaving yourself. Be the sexual monster that you were born to be. We are coming to an age where judgment and ridicule is slowly starting to dissipate- for both sexes.

Granted, the progress is slower for one sex in particular- but since when is it right for other peoples’ judgmental bullshit to prevent you from reaching the best you that you can be? Like it or not, the true you isn’t the good little schoolgirl; it’s the naughty teacher that has her students spank her with her own ruler.

We are all sexual predators- nymphomaniacs. The sooner the world comes to accept this, the sooner we can let go of all the false beliefs we associate with each individual sex. Don’t judge. Just fuck.

Paul Hudson | Elite.