Relationships

Learn From The Best: Relationship Lessons From Jay-Z And Beyoncé

by Kayla Inglima

Beyoncé & Jay-Z are undoubtedly one of the most powerful, influential and talented couples in the world. In both their own respects, they have dominated their industries and beyond.

Despite reaching immense success and fame, they have managed to keep a down-to-earth demeanor in their relationship, and that has made them one of the most envied romances in America. The traits that their relationship holds are not rare or extraordinary.

These traits are simple aspects that can be applied to any relationship to keep it healthy, happy and moving forward. These are some of the things that have kept B & Jay dangerously in love and that everyone can, and should, apply to their own relationships.

1. They Keep It Private

Beyoncé & Jay-Z have consistently kept their relationship, and the details of it, under wraps. They have somehow managed to dodge many of the pitfalls of celebrity romance, by keeping their love out of the spotlight as much as possible. While speculation and gossip is bound to hit any celebrity couple, they’ve kept the majority of their relationship extremely secluded from the press.

This is a lesson that you can apply to your own relationship, just replace the press with your social circle. If you and your partner share a group of friends, it is best to keep the details of your relationship as private as possible.

The more people know about your relationship, the more power they have to affect it or affect your view of it. People aren’t always trustworthy; telling a friend the details of a fight might seem harmless, but that’s how rumors are started and suddenly your boyfriend/girlfriend is hearing a twisted version of your own words. Unless it's essential, keep most of your romance on the DL.

2. They Strive For Goals

Think of your relationship like a train. The only way it can move forward is if both wheels are on the same track. This is something that Beyoncé & Jay-Z have done since the beginning of their relationship. They have both set goals and haven’t sacrificed achieving them for relationship issues. I mean, “99 problems but a bitch ain't one” says it all.

They don’t deter each other from working toward their goals for petty bullsh*t relationship issues; instead they encourage each other and support each other. Having goals is an essential part of achieving a successful life. If one partner in a relationship is lazy or unmotivated, it will inevitably bring the other person down or slow them from reaching their own goals.

3. They Understand Each Other's Work

While Jay-Z and Beyoncé share a career field (which is rare), it doesn’t mean you can’t apply this to your own relationship if you don’t work in the same area as your partner. If your boyfriend/girlfriend is a brain surgeon, you don’t literally need to know how to perform an operation, but you need to understand the emotions and issues that come with it.

Understanding the stressors, deadlines and day-to-day happenings of your partner’s job will help your relationship. When Beyoncé’s in the studio for hours, Jay knows the deal. Understanding what your partner's work entails will help improve your relationship. If you understand that your girlfriend is stressed all week from working on a presentation, excuse her bitchiness -- maybe even give her flowers.

If you know your man has work meetings every Thursday, have a good meal waiting for him when he gets home. It's little things like this that maintain a healthy relationship and keep it moving in the right direction.

4. He's Not Afraid To Let Her Do Her Thing

Jay-Z isn’t covering up Beyoncé’s body, editing her sexy choreography or hiding the fact that she’s one of the most appealing women in the world. No, instead he embraces it. He completely lets her be her, and he isn’t afraid of doing so because he trusts her. Insecurity and jealousy are signs of the weak, and in a boyfriend, make you look like a pussy.

By showing that you're okay with your girl going out and looking sexy if she so chooses, it shows that you have confidence and you're not afraid that she’s going to suddenly abandon her morals because she dropped her neckline. Trusting your girl isn’t only a turn on, it's also healthy for your relationship.

5. She Doesn't Take Offense To Things He Does/Says

In keeping with #4, Beyoncé seems not to care that Jay-Z uses words like “Bitch” in his songs or spits lines like “F*ck it, I might wife you and buy you nice whips ma, but you really gotta ride nice dick." It’s obviously a part of his artistic work and she hasn’t held it against him. Think of this more in terms of things your boyfriend says when he’s amongst his friends or trying to look cool.

He might say some dumbass, douchey, misogynistic shit, but in reality it’s probably just to gain appeal amongst his peers. Or it might just be the way he naturally acts with his friends. Don’t hold it against him, if he is different with you, then that’s probably who he really is. So let go of any animosity you have for the way he acts. Boys are stupid…get over it.

6. They Share Tastes In Music

I will never forget watching the HBO Beyoncé Documentary and nearly crying watching Jay & Bey sing Coldplay’s "Yellow" together because it was so adorable. Clearly their shared music taste reaches beyond their respective hip hop and pop genres. You don’t necessarily need to like everything that your boyfriend/girlfriend is in to musically, but having a few shared genres is a great thing to bond over.

Obviously if you and your partner are hanging out relaxing, driving, at the beach, etc. it's going to be beneficial to be able to listen to the same music and to actually enjoy it. In addition, if you are both fans of a certain group or artist, attending a concert/festival can be a fun activity for you to do together.

7. They Publicly Support Each Other

Showing you support your partner during both the good times and the bad is essential for a healthy relationship. Examples being: When Beyoncé accepted her Billboard Millennium Award stating, “I love me some Jay-Z” or any of the multiple shoutouts Jay-Z gives her in his music. By supporting each other in public, it's basically giving a big middle finger to haters and naysayers.

While it's important to be private, when you are speaking publicly about your relationship or partner, the only option is to be supportive and to show the strength of your relationship through your actions and words. Not standing up for your partner, or worse bashing them, just shows that your relationship isn’t real, and makes you look like an assh*le.

8. They Keep Time Aside For Fun

"All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy"…and Beyoncé, and Jay-Z, and you, and me, and everyone. You can’t have a successful life or relationship if you don’t allot time for fun or relaxation. If you’re going to go hard in work or any aspect of your life, you need to make sure that you leave time to do things you enjoy as well.

Jay and B frequently take vacations, and just recently were seen over the July 4th weekend taking time off and taking their daughter Blue Ivy to a playground. By making time to do things you enjoy with your partner, you can escape the mundane and routine. Having fun or relaxing with your boyfriend/girlfriend is an absolutely necessary part of any relationship. Without it, one or both of you will become uptight/irritable and conflict will inevitably ensue.

9. They Can Deal With Long Distance

Beyoncé and Jay-Z are working artists and that means much of the time they are on tour and spending time apart. They clearly have trust in each other to be apart, and have found certain ways to combat the hardships of spending time away. In many relationships, this situation is a reality. Whether it be short or long distances, many couples, due to work or other factors, have to spend time apart.

In order to deal with distance, you need to have trust and find creative ways to keep the relationship functioning. In keeping with this, you also can't smother your partner. You need to be able to deal with time apart, and embrace it. Too much time spent together will eventually allow you to become annoyed at the little things, frustrated, and searching for an escape. This is not a place you want to be in a relationship, so it's important to keep a balance between togetherness and time on your own.

10. They Don't Blow Up Social Media

One of the things I love most about Jay-Z and Beyoncé is their level of anonymity on the Internet and social media. They aren’t constantly posting pictures and rarely post any of one another. When they do post pictures or talk about each other, they are truly meaningful and special ones. Nothing is more annoying than logging onto a social media site and seeing post upon post, picture upon picture, of how much a certain couple “loves each other.”

At first, it might be cute, but at a certain point, it becomes annoying and begs the question: 'If you guys are so in love, why do you feel the need to shove it in everyone’s face?' Be discreet with pics of your boyfriend/girlfriend and virtual PDAs. By not shoving your relationship in everyone’s face, it can only be assumed that it is a healthy and a happy one.

Photo Credit: Beyoncé | I Am Tumbler