The Reasons Why You Never Want To Marry A Sorority Girl

The Reasons Why You Never Want To Marry A Sorority Girl
Sex
Like Us On Facebook
Like Us On Facebook

When it comes to dating and marriage, 2013 just isn’t your year. The modern relationship has killed marriage and monogamy.

Maybe all the great prospects have been picked because the older I get, the fewer marriageable prospects I meet. In this case, good things don’t come to those who wait. Maybe I have ridiculous standards, but I don’t want to settle for less when choosing a partner for the rest of my life.

Throughout my college years, I was caught up in the mirage of sorority girls and now I realized I should have been going after the less obvious types. Not the ones stuck in a world of UGG boots, north face jackets and endless supplies of Starbucks. Of course, not every sorority girl is like this, but here are some common traits I found during my time in college that has made me never want to marry a sorority girl:

They’re entitled

tumblr_lhg59tBdcv1qhwx9so1_500_large

Having pledged and gone through the sorority treatment, these girls feel like they’ve earned something. Sorority girls believe they’ve skyrocketed in status as soon as they set foot in the sorority house. The worst part is that this sense of entitlement doesn’t leave the Greek Life bubble.


They drink a lot

TheNewDuckfaceSororitySquat-96372

They. Get. Tanked. And sometimes they get sloppy, a lot of times really. It’s not that cute now and it won’t be cute at your wedding.


They like attention

table_talk_tumblr

They didn’t join a sorority for the ya ya sisterhood. These girls, often enough, enjoy attention. You want to marry an independent woman, not someone who begs you to pay attention to her all the time.


They’re disloyal

tumblr_mdn71sqAT61rjmvrao1_500

Sorority girls don’t exactly have the most pristine reputations when it comes to either friendships or relationships. If you were married, you’d have to wonder if she would stray.


They’re needy

tumblr_lfpk6mtVpW1qgs8tho1_500

I’ve been to too many sorority parties with a crying girl hugging a bottle of Svedka in the corner.


They think too much of themselves

tumblr_m42pfbJNid1qeetf7o1_500

They’re the queens of campus… until four years go by and it’s all downhill.


They’re messy

messy-apartment

Sorority houses, opium dens, pig styes: interchangeable.


They’re immature

university-arizona-kappa-alpha-theta-girls-lead1

Their Greek life gossip will not end at graduation.

 


They’re lazy

tumblr_mbusfqJvJk1r6inxdo1_500

They’ve gotten things handed to them all their lives, and they don’t plan on doing anything different.


 

They’re unhappy

large

At the end of the day — after all the parties and booze — I found that the cattiness and constant bitchiness took its toll on the girls. They’re not happy and if they aren’t happy, then how can they make you happy?

For the opposing argument, check out the rebuttal piece: “The 10 Reasons Why You Should Marry A Sorority Woman.”

Share Tweet
React

Eddie Cuffin

Eddie Cuffin likes to stir up controversy. He is the persona of a man who gets the people talking, with his cynical and satirical take on New York City and American culture.

More In Sex

Sex Sabrina Cugliari

Why Hook-Up Culture Is Not The Problem With The Gen-Y Dating Game

If I never hear the term “hook-up culture” again, it will be too soon. Everything that is seemingly wrong with our generation has been attributed to the above phrase. Do you have a fear of intimacy? Are you unable to take responsibility for your actions? Blame it on the hook-up culture. A certain moral panic has […]

Sex Paul Hudson

The Torture Of Loving A Person Who Doesn’t Love You Back

The first woman I ever fell in love with didn’t feel the same way about me. This wasn’t some sort of crush either. I really did fall in love and she really didn’t care for me that much. Sure, we would see each other pretty regularly. She was happy to see me, but not exactly […]

Sex Bridget Boland

Is It Time To Call It Quits? When To Know A Relationship Is Over

We are the generation twice removed from the Cleavers; the aftermath of the rise in divorce rates. We have seen all kinds of relationships modeled for us. In some ways, this transparency of what happens in other marriages is helpful, but it also creates uncertainties when trying to create our own. Being a member of Gen-Y can feel like you […]

Sex Paul Hudson

Why Being Loved Is Not The Same As Being Understood

Most people are looking for that one person whom they can love and who can love them – that one person who will be there for them, care for them and understand them. Being understood is often confused with being loved; the two aren’t the same. Most people assume that those whom they love, they […]

Sex Audrey Swanson

The 11 Things You Learn From Being The Only Single Friend

Maybe you’ve glanced around recently and found yourself as the only person in your friend group not frolicking into a new romantic venture. It’s like spring is the season of new boyfriends or something. Trust me, being the single friend is not as bad as everyone makes it out to be. It just means your […]

Also On Elite

World

The Plot Thickens In Ukraine: Pro-Russian Activists Declare Independence In Donetsk

Protesters in Donetsk, Ukraine’s industrial center, officially proclaimed their independence from Kiev on Monday. The proclamation came with a pledge to hold a referendum within the next month, with protesters promising action no later than May 11. Protesters have also officially asked that Russia ready “peacekeeping troops.” Clearly, this reads like a dead ringer for […]

Women

Introducing The YUM: The New Term For Any Well-Dressed And Well-Groomed Young Man

Meet the object of your latest man obsession: the YUM, or “Young Urban Male.” HSBC is credited with this fitting acronym, although it’s kind of inexplicable as to why a financial institution has taken to doling out classifications for the upcoming grade of “it guys.” It might, however, have something to do with all the […]

LOL Lists

The All Star Team: The 8 Guys You Need By Your Side For An Epic Night Out

Disclaimer: If you’re not one of the types of guys listed, it doesn’t mean you aren’t awesome, but just that your nights don’t regularly reflect the events in “The Hangover.” This list is for the people who understand the deep fear associated with the question, “Bro, what happened last night?” We already know about the girls you […]

Humor

What Would Happen If We Treated Real Life Communication Like Email? (Video)

Let’s face it: email sucks. From weeding out countless spam to writing in a tone that isn’t yours or anybody’s because it’s just the universally accepted way to write emails. To play on how unnatural the whole culture of emailing is, Solar Winds put together a video of what it would be like in real […]