People Reveal The Straight-Up Weirdest Things They've Used To Masturbate

Recently, an Australian movie-goer allegedly brought a cucumber to the theater where she was watching "Fifty Shades Darker."

Now, this person OBVIOUSLY could have been bringing in the full-sized cucumber to snack on throughout the film, or maybe they were going to chop it up for a little mid-movie salad.

BUT, considering the fact that the theater manager found the full-on cucumber totally uneaten, I'm going to guess this person's intentions with the cucumber were not so pure.

Yeah, that person was definitely getting freaky... with a cucumber.

Naturally, this forces us to beg the question, what are some other weird things people have gotten freaky with? Well, we asked some Reddit users, and, BOY, did people deliver.

Here are the literal WEIRDEST things people have used to masturbate:

An almost-out-of-battery toothbrush

A Sharper Image Warming Backrest Massager

ALL of his ex's bras and panties

A rolled-up sleeping bag

Panties he specifically bought for masturbating

A homemade Fleshlight

His other hand

A baseball glove

The handle of a flashlight

And if NONE of those answers were weird enough for you, my co-worker once masturbated with the TV remote control.

Don't worry, I asked, and she wasn't watching TV while she did it, so it didn't interfere with the channels.

Because I'm sure that was your only question.

Citations: LADIES, what's the weirdest thing you've ever used to masturbate? (Reddit), What's the weirdest thing you've ever used to masturbate with? (Reddit)