Virtual Reality Sex Is Now Just As Good As Regular Sex

HELLO FROM THE FUTURE!

Still jerking off to porn alone in your room with your two hands like a Stone Age peasant? Time to UPGRADE yourself to some 21st century modern intimacy.

I'm not going to lie; this freaks me out. I'm all about modern technology and think it's so cool we're living in a world where all of this is really possible but it does also scare the living daylights out of me.

Anyway, that's neither here nor there. If you are wild and adventurous enough to try out this new high-tech way to jerk it, let me run you through how it works.

Have you heard of those virtual reality goggles? The ones that make people look like total nerds. Well, I don't know if you've ever actually tried a pair on but, let me tell you from personal experience, they WORK.

I put on a pair and headed off for "vacation" to the Swiss Alps. You guys, I felt like I was there. No joke. You move your head around and it's all there. The sky above you, the ground below you, ALL OF IT. It's nuts.

So it was only a matter of time before we used this super believable virtual reality technology to help us with sexy time.

Now, you can slap on the goggles, pick a model you want to bone and get as close to boning a model as you (a hard six with a good personality) will ever get.

Because, you see, this isn't just like watching porn. It's not even like just watching the Swiss Alps like I did with my VR goggles. No, this is a multidimensional experience.

Not only are you watching your sexual encounter with this model in 3D, but you and your partner are both actually feeling the entire experience using a new technological advancement called "teledildonics."

Still don't really get it? Watch the video and see for yourself here:

Citations: You can now have 'long-distance sex' using VR and connected sex toys (Metro)