John Mayer Wants You To Spend $160 On His Beaded Necklaces
Hahahahahahahahhahah, OK. Good luck with this one, John Mayer.
For some reason, when celebrities get big by doing one thing, they think it gives them the ability to do some other thing completely unrelated to that first thing — like reality stars getting music careers.
Of course, these all fail, and John Mayer is about to learn that the hard way when he realizes nobody wants to buy $160 worth of necklaces from the guy who called our bodies “Wonderlands” #IMNOTA6FLAGS.
The 38-year-old singer and former Taylor Swift beau is making a run at the jewelry business with a series of remarkably high-priced products for mega-fans to throw their hard earned money at.
OK, John. Sure.
Neckwear not a thing you’re into? Don’t worry, Johnny has your back.
Oh yeah! I forgot to mention John Mayer is also in the high-end mini-purse game.
Actually, Johnny’s retail store is full of the most bizarre series of John Mayer-branded chachkies.
Seriously, look at this stuff.
This is a John Mayer duffle bag.
These are John Mayer lyric patches and lapel pins.
This is just a straight-up John Mayer plaid shirt
This is a John Mayer wine tote, a thing I didn’t know was a thing to begin with.
This is an awful John Mayer hat being sold next to a really nice John Mayer mug.
These are John Mayer logo beads. I don’t know what this product even is.
John Mayer also sells a wide belly stone mug.
This dude has got like 50 different ceramic mugs on his website. He’s a walking Williams-Sonoma with a guitar and probable STIs.
Fun fact: Of course John Mayer’s website is one big Tinder profile.
Best of luck to you and your branded lapel pins, John Mayer.
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