Lifestyle

16 Shameless Babies Who Can't Stop Staring At Boobs (Photos)

by Connor Toole

There's nothing wrong with having a "sophisticated" sense of humor, but just because you can understand more complex jokes and obscure references doesn't mean you should suddenly stop appreciating the more sophomoric things you come across.

There's a reason I don't trust people who don't think farts are funny: They've lost the ability to appreciate the simple things in life. There are certain concepts that I firmly believe are objectively hilarious, and a lot of them are things most people would consider stupid or moronic.

The only thing you're going to find below this block of text are pictures of small children staring at women's breasts. Some readers might find this objectionable -- they are incorrect.

It's a hilarious commentary about the unchanging tendencies of man and an examination of just how similar we all are on a spiritual level.

I'm just kidding. Set your brain to "lowbrow" and get ready to see some of the most shameless children in existence. I've tried to caption each photo with an alternative explanation, but I think we all know the deal.

"Something doesn't feel right, but I can't put my hand on.. MY GOD! An imposter!"

"What's your name! I demand to speak to a manager at once!" "I hope that mole isn't cancerous. She should probably get that checked out."

You can't see his shirt, but it says "Future Dermatologist."

"I can't believe she's allowed to wear that to work!"

What kind of establishment would allow such an outfit?

"That outfit doesn't seem practical for pirating."

It's like she wants to lose a sword fight.

"I like owls. A lot."

Little kids love cute animals. It seems like a reasonable explanation. "That bra's craftsmanship is truly divine."

There's a chance he was simply distracted by shiny things.

"That lacing! So intricate and detailed -- what a triumph!"

He really appreciates that Disney pays such close attention to detal.

"What a pretty necklace. I wonder how much it cost."

It could be a great gift for one of his four girlfriends at preschool. "I hope the photographer doesn't catch me picking my nose. I can't think of anything more embarrassing." You'd hate to get caught in a compromising situation. "Her hair's so smooth! I wonder what products she uses." It's probably Pantene Pro-V. "No nipples. I guess that solves that mystery." "It has a belly button, though. Good to know." I don't have an alternative for this one. This kid is staring at boobs harder than anyone has ever stared at boobs before. He's so shameless, he could be a series on Showtime starring William H. Macy. See above. He's so shameless, he could be the British show the aforementioned program was inspired by. "What a fascinating interview with Mark Ruffalo. I've really gained a newfound respect for his acting." Just reading the articles. "Please don't drop me. Please don't drop me. Please don't drop me." He's far too worried about his own survival to pay attention to anything else. "FEEEEEEEED MEEEEEEE!!!!!" This could have been the caption for basically any of these. The thirst is real.