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Cruel Canadian Cops Threaten Holiday Season Drunk Drivers With Nickleback

People loosen the reigns during the holidays, which often leads to drunk driving.

The worst holiday for drunk driving is the Fourth of July. In 2013, Independence Day drunk driving was involved in over 500 deaths.

But the Christmas/New Year’s season is extremely dangerous as well. It is estimated that DUI-related traffic stops increase by around 33 percent on Christmas Eve, and that, on New Year’s Eve, 42 percent of accidents can be attributed to drunk driving.

The numbers are pretty shocking, and cops don’t really know what to do to curb the dangerous habit.

In fact, they’re willing to try anything.

Take the Kensington Police Department in Prince Edward Island, Canada.

They decided to post an intimidating warning on their Facebook page, letting drunk drivers out there know if they get caught, they will be treated without mercy.

If caught… *shudder*… the drunk driver… *cringe*… would be forced to… *sob*… listen to Nickleback.

The Facebook post reads:

When we catch you, and we will catch you, on top of a hefty fine, a criminal charge and a years driving suspension we will also provide you with a bonus gift of playing the offices copy of Nickelback in the cruiser on the way to jail.

They even posted a photograph of the Nickleback album, which is, for some reason (Canada do you need help?) a cassette.

The album is “Silver Side Up,” by the way, for all the Nickles out there. (Is that what you guys call yourselves? or is it Nacks? Please get back to me on this.)

They end the post quite elegantly:

So please, lets not ruin a perfectly good unopened copy of Nickelback. You don’t drink and drive and we won’t make you listen to it.

Here is the full album by the way, just in case you were curious.

I just wonder when the day will come that shitting on Nickleback will stop being funny. Because that day will come, as it will for Mumford and Sons… but it is not this day.

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Alec MacDonald

Editor

Alec MacDonald is a humor writer for Elite Daily. He graduated from Vassar college and received an MFA in fiction from Sarah Lawrence. He was born and raised in New York City, which is where Home Alone 2 takes place. He loves you very much.
Alec MacDonald is a humor writer for Elite Daily. He graduated from Vassar college and received an MFA in fiction from Sarah Lawrence. He was born and raised in New York City, which is where Home Alone 2 takes place. He loves you very much.

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