Boys are stupid. They all agreed to help each other pretend like they’re all very relaxed and cool about dating, but the truth is, every human being is just a terrified rat stuck in a wall, calling out for companionship.
Wow, OK, that metaphor got away from me.
Let me start at the beginning.
So this cool, chill, relaxed bro went on Facebook one day to inform his peers, and I quote,
There are some clingy ass girls in this world like goddamn.
Yes, it was his duty to spread the word.
“Clingy” here is really just a synonym for the phrase,
Girls love me, haha, and I’ve had sex before.
It’s also one of the age-old, go-to words men use to assert dominance and belittle the women willing to sleep with them.
Here is the status that started it all.
His cool, chill, relaxed friend Greg, and 21 other people, happily agreed with him. Because, apparently, Ben has friends just as annoying as him.
But then, Jessica got involved, posting this screenshot of her conversation with cool, chill, sexually powerful Ben.
The truth was slowly coming out.
It didn’t end there because Daphné joined the fray.
I’d like everyone to picture Ben slowly shrinking in size, until he can fit into a Solo cup.
And, finally, Anika sealed the deal.
Maybe keep your mouth shut next time, Ben. As Jesus surely said,
Being sexist doesn’t make you sexier.
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