Guy Heartbroken By Ex-Girlfriend Who Cheated With His Best Friend Writes Epic Letter To New Couple

Guy Heartbroken By Ex-Girlfriend Who Cheated With His Best Friend Writes Epic Letter To New Couple
Humor
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One of the most f*cked up things a person can do is leave a partner for his or her best friend.

Unfortunately, this is something we see far too often. Finding himself in this bleak situation, one man decided to seek his own kind of revenge while also making a profit. His girlfriend Jessica apparently left him for his best friend, Todd, and he was pretty pissed off about it (rightfully so).

He took to Teespring.com to create a “F*ck You Todd & Jessica” t-shirt, which you can actually purchase. The description of the product is absolutely incredible and it’ll only cost you $13!

front

Check it out:


“F*CK YOU JESSICA! YOU GIRAFFE FACED BITCH. I WAS NOTHING BUT GOOD TO YOU. I WAS THERE FOR YOU WHEN YOU NEEDED ME. AND HOW DO YOU REPAY ME? BY DUMPING ME FOR MY BEST FRIEND.

YOU NOW MEAN NOTHING TO ME YOU SYPHILITIC C*NT DONKEY. NEVER TRAVEL TO AFRICA BECAUSE POACHERS MIGHT MISTAKE YOU FOR A RHINO YOU FAT POT BELLIED HERMAPHRODITE. PEOPLE USED TO THINK I WAS A BIG FOOT HUNTER WHEN THEY SAW ME WITH YOU.

I HOPE YOU AND YOUR MURKY SWAMP VAGINA END UP ALONE. IT’S CALLED VAGISIL YOU CHERUBIC CONCUBINE TWAT LORD.

AS FOR YOU TODD, YOU ARE A BITCH OF THE HIGHEST ORDER. YOU SMELL LIKE A MUSTY 6TH GRADER AFTER GYM CLASS WHO TRIED TO USE AXE TO COVER UP THE SMELL.

YOUR BREATH SMELLS LIKE AGED COW TURDS. IF YOU WERE ON FIRE AND I HAD A BUCKET OF WATER, I WOULD LET MY DOG DRINK FROM THE BUCKET FIRST, AND THEN PUT YOU OUT WITH WHATEVER WAS LEFT.

YOUR TEETH ARE SO F*CKED UP THAT YOU COULD HAVE DUAL CITIZENSHIP IN ENGLAND. YOUR TEETH LOOK LIKE THEY ARE WRITING A NOVEL IN WINGDINGS.

I HOPE YOU TWO HAVE KIDS. I CAN ONLY IMAGINE THE FUGLY OFFSPRING THAT SWAMP PUSSY AND AXE GOD WOULD PRODUCE.

YOUR KIDS WILL PROBABLY HAVE THE LOW SLOPING FOREHEADS MOST COMMONLY ASSOCIATED WITH LOWLAND GORILLAS. YOU SHOULD JUST NAME YOUR FIRST BORN CRO MAGNON.

F*CK YOU TODD AND JESSICA. EAT SH*T.”


Jessica: I feel for you, I really do. But, I’m gonna have to agree with your ex on this one: eat sh*t.

H/T: Bro Bible, Photo Courtesy: Tee Spring

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Ashley Fern

Ashley comes to Elite Daily from the happiest valley in State College, Pennsylvania. She was born and raised between New York and South Florida, but spent the most fun years at Penn State. Her time spent there proved you can have the best time of your life by doing things you can't remember while simultaneously pursuing a political science degree. She divides her time between binge-watching “Entourage,” giving unwanted opinions and convincing herself that she will one day marry Dwyane Wade. For more unadulterated fun follow her on Twitter and Instagram at @Disco_Infern0.

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