Guy Smashes Ex-GF's Vibrator For Revenge Because 'She Loved It More Than Him'

As has been proven over and over again, there is no creature with pride more fragile and ego more manic than the human male.

Case in point: Meet Rich Moore, a 33-year-old human male from Orpington, London.

He's made headlines for smashing his ex-girlfriend's vibrator (and expensive sunglasses) in a fit of jealous rage over the inanimate, store-bought, superior lover.

The story goes like this: Rich Moore went to his ex's apartment to get his things after their recent breakup.

While there, he saw her vibrator.

Apparently, this vibrator was the source of much contention in their relationship because the mere sight of it sent him into a rage and he destroyed it.

His ex, Sarah Mills, went ahead and reported him to the police for the damage, which included a $200 pair of sunglasses.

Moore succinctly and straightforwardly explained his feelings to The Sun:

She loved the dildo more than me.

If you're having trouble understanding the situation, let me help you with this expository graphic.

He went on to confess, “I found the dildo and I just ripped it up.”

Interesting choice of words here. Not exactly sure how one “rips up a vibrator,"  but I never said Moore was a wordsmith. I only said he was an asshole.

Wait, did I actually say he was an asshole yet? Shit. Sorry. Let me remedy that: Moore is an asshole.

Moore was charged with criminal damage and will be released on bail on October 19.

I hope he has to do community service at a sex shop, where he will have to individually apologize to each and every hard-working orgasm toy.

I'd like to take a moment of silence for all the vibrators out there who get caught in the crossfire of male jealousy. You guys are the real heroes.

Citations: The Sun