Naked Dudes Slide Around Bathtubs On This Hilarious Japanese Game Show

Screw “Shark Tank,” screw “Survivor,” screw all “The Real Housewives,” screw “Property Brothers,” screw “Survivor: Palau” and screw “Road Rules.”

Japan has a game show called “Monday Lateshow – Suiyo kara Yofukashi” where at least one of its segments is just chubby dudes screwin' around in bathtubs, and it's by far the most entertaining thing ever created.

America, you aren't doing reality TV right.

This man is my spirit animal.

Here is what is great about this guy: In the beginning of the segment, he was literally labeled "Fat" by whichever judgmental "The Devil Wears Prada"-types run this variety show.

That doesn't stop this beautiful phoenix from spreading his majestic wings, though.

UHHHHHH, I'm sorry, but does this guy NOT have the grace of a gentle gazelle in the Serengeti or the 1984 Sarajevo Olympics gold-medal figure skater, Katarina Witt?!?!?!

Much like cooking and talking to a girl without getting super clammy or doing a finger-gun hand movement after telling her, "Lookin' good, Ace," tub spinnin' is a skill that takes years of mastering. Grape explains,

The group of friends had a tradition in their dormitory bathroom to slide around the edge of the hot bath (naked) and get to the other side. It was a tradition for them to compete in this sport, but with news that their dorm would be shutting down to be replaced with a new one, the TV crew of the 'Monday Night Late Show' visited them to film their desperate attempts to get to the other side. The staff was stuck filming them for hours until they finally caught the majestic moment on film.

Not that any of that matters. The only thing that matters is you watching more of this guy work his magic on the bathtub.

Anyway, just watch these GIFs of this all-star human slidin'.

Zen.

As.

F*ck.

Citations: A Japanese TV Show Had A Bunch Of Naked Guys Try To Slide Around The Edge Of A Bathtub (BuzzFeed)