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Jason Thomspon | Elite.
This entire chart should say “Never,” but if we’re trying to be nice, here’s a chart that tells you how acceptable your goatee is. If you can rock a goatee, you should definitely rock a goatee — no harm done if someone besides you and your mirror think it looks good. However, the majority of […]
My roommate is basically killing it this week by finding the most epic videos I have seen in quite sometime. Yesterday we had “Snow White And The Seven Thugs” and today, continuing in Disney fashion, we have Kristen Bell singing a parody of “Spoonful of Sugar” about wages. For anyone who reads my articles, you […]
Three naked, college-aged bros in Southwest Florida were so hungry one night that they broke into a burger shack looking for raw meat around 3 am and stole three pounds of bacon, three red peppers, 60 burgers and a paddleboard from Doc’s Beach House. Waitress Nancy Sansevieri found the bros and called them “dumb, dumber, and dumbest.” And, […]
“Chinese Democracy.” “Detox.” Over the course of modern music, there have been a number of widely anticipated albums, but I can’t imagine that anyone has ever felt the anticipation that I feel for the upcoming release of “Miracle,” the first real offering from musical sensation IceJJFish. If you don’t know who IceJJFish is, I’m both […]
There are some things you just can’t do unless you’re a toddler. Babies are privileged. They don’t have to respond when adults are talking to them, they don’t have to worry about eating politely and they can shout their ages — “I’m 2 and a half, mommy!” — any time they feel like it. Toddlers […]
Apparently, there’s a Kickstarter for everything. First there was that potato salad Kickstarter and now there’s one to fund the world’s biggest dick drawing. Yep. You read that right. One brave pioneer by the name of Alex Wong (he should probably change it to Wang) is spearheading a movement to draw the world’s largest cock […]
Everyone is giving Britney Spears grief for the recent leak of her single “Alien,” which was released sans auto-tune. I listened to the song and it was, not surprisingly, terrible. However, no one ever labeled Britney Spears as being the next Mariah Carey — that was Christina Aguilera, remember? I don’t understand what is shocking […]
If you’re one of those people who doesn’t concern him or herself with international conflicts over disputed territories, then yesterday’s biggest news story featured a husband who kept a spreadsheet of the excuses his wife used to avoid sex since the beginning of July. A picture of the document quickly went viral, and even garnered a […]
Popstar wannabe Rosa G created a music video called “Fourth of July” where she talks about how much she loves America and the Fourth of July. But it’s important to note that Rosa G does not seem like she’s an American nor does she seem like she actually celebrates the Fourth of July, considering she’s […]
This past week, the ban on same-sex marriage in Indiana and Utah was found to be unconstitutional. But of course, like in any situation where progress marches proudly on, there are those who just can’t seem to get on board. Utah Attorney General Sean Reyes is one of those people. Though surely there are many […]
Even though parallel parking is something almost every single driver will encounter in life, there are still certain states that don’t require people to prove they can perform the incredible task before granting them a license. Some mediocre drivers get around this problem by refusing to drive anywhere parallel parking will be required. Other people […]
Not too long ago, we introduced you to these awesome, LED backlit paddleboards that make navigating in the ocean during the evening super fun. This time, we’re introducing you to an even cooler watercraft. It’s called the Aquila – an electric-powered surfboard that’ll make everyone on the beach jealous this summer. The company describes the device as […]