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Lena Dunham Shows Us The Only 5 Times It's OK To 'Grab 'Em By The Pussy'

by Zara Barrie
Lena Dunham/Jess Rotter

Thank God for talented, brilliant, witty females. I really don't think I could survive another day in this sick world without kickass women providing us with thoughtful, yet hilarious social commentary.

Lately, it's the only thing that reminds me that I'm NOT, in fact, losing my fucking marbles, and even in the thick of misogynistic negativity, there are still like-minded ladies out there who are as disgusted as I am with boneheads like Donald Trump.

And they won't stay quiet. Nah, these ladies will use their rage, and turn it into ART.

Nah, these ladies will use their rage, and turn it into ART.

Speaking of funny, outspoken women, my favorite celebrity, Lena Dunham, teamed up with artist Jess Rotter to explain five examples of when it's appropriate to "grab 'em by the pussy."

Thank God for that, because men like Donald Trump seem to think it's OK to "grab 'em by the pussy," if you're famous enough! (Pshhh, that's just "locker room talk," silly girls!)

In this hilarious series of illustrations and commentary, the two women truly teach us proper pussy-grabbing etiquette. And none of them take place in the locker room, Donald. NONE.

Lena Dunham/Jessica Rotter

So note to people everywhere: You can indeed "grab 'em by the pussy" when you need to grab your close friend, whose name is actually Pussy (which to me, sounds like a badass old-school socialite name).

Or, when you're chasing your actual pussy-cat on the run. Or, when you're a girl, and you're getting down on the dance floor, grabbing your own pussy.

Or, when you accidentally leave your own pussy in the bathroom (when you're washing it pre-sex, duh).

Or, when you're a kid dressed as a pussy-cat for Halloween, hiding out in the Trump Tower, and your mom is freaked out.

These are the FEW times when it's OK to do such a thing as "grab 'em by the pussy."

However, it's important to note that it's NEVER OK to "grab 'em by the pussy" when you're a fuckboy talking about how you try to get girls.

That's actually sexual assault, which is illegal. And if I were president, I would surely throw anyone who sexually assaults women in JAIL.

Citations: By the Pussy (Lenny Letter)