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4 Ways To Handle Selfish People Without Cutting Them Out Of Your Life

Everyone knows someone selfish in his or her life.

These people’s names might not be Sally or Steve, but they're there.

Everyone is selfish at one point or another, but some people have a tendency to make everything about them all of the time.

It can be easy to say, “Oh, you should just toss those people out of your life!”

But what if that person is a relative or someone you can't see yourself living without?

What if his or her amazing qualities outweigh the fact that person can be super selfish?

Here are four life hacks to improve your relationship with someone who is selfish:

1. Accept this is who he or she is.

Everyone has flaws, and this is his or hers.

If you've known this person for a long time and he or she has always had selfish tendencies, understand that you probably won't be able to change the person.

If you love this person, accept this and try to understand where he or she is coming from.

Trying to understand someone doesn't mean accepting or excusing his or her behavior.

Sometimes truly accepting someone can help you feel better about the relationship and become less annoyed by the person.

It will just help you to view this person from a different light and help you communicate with him or her more effectively.

If you respond to this person’s behavior with anger, it will only exacerbate the problem.


2. Take breaks from this person when you need it, and explain why if he or she asks.

It can seem harsh to tell someone you need to take a break because he or she is draining your energy.

Chances are, the person won't understand, but it can be a necessary lesson.

Remind this person you have needs in the relationship, too.

Instead of losing your temper and saying, “You never listen to me!” or “Everything is always all about you!” try asking him or her to listen to you.

Tell this person you're having a problem or a hard day, and ask if he or she is willing to listen.

Chances are, this person will respond positively.

Never forget to put yourself before your relationships in order for them to thrive.


3. If you’re feeling like a doormat, stop doing favors for this person.

If you tend to drop everything for your friend or relative, he or she will get used to it.

The next time, tell this person you're busy and you’ll get to the favor later.

If this person keeps bothering you, remind him or her you're doing a favor and you don’t have to do it at all.


4. If you’re drained by this person, protect your energy.

It might sound weird at first, but imagine putting on a cloak (or anything else you want to visualize) before seeing this person.

Tell yourself you are protecting your energy from this person’s selfishness or negativity.

If you practice this a few times, you might see your attitude change.

If you are frustrated with someone in your life who seems to always have a me-me-me attitude, take a step back.

First, assess if this relationship is worth having in your life.

If it is, take the time to truly accept and try to understand this person.

Next, communicate properly and don't let this person make you a doormat.

The harsh truth may be the only thing that will make this person see your needs as a priority.

But if this person loves you, he or she will.

This could take time, but it will be worth it to keep this person in your life.

Plus, both of you can learn a valuable life lesson in the process.

Do you have anyone selfish in your life? How do you deal with it?

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Lauren Stewart

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