Why I'd Rather F*ck Up For Myself Than Listen To Blind Advice
“Don't ever take advice. That was great advice.”
On first listen, this seems like just another quotable lyric from a catchy Drake song.
But it's actually much deeper than that, especially when you consider it beyond the context of rap and “bitches” (rappin' bitches, bitches).
It's counterintuitive and somewhat ironic. “Don't ever take advice,” Drake says — as advice.
I agree with him on this. This piece of advice is the only one worth taking.
Advice is usually subjective. One person's success won't be another's. What works great for Person A could be a bad move for Person B.
But I've still always valued advice. Whether good or bad, advice will always provide you with a new perspective — and, a lot of times, that's valuable in itself. For that reason, I'll always be receptive to other people's suggestions.
Now, whether or not I choose to put their words into action… well, that's a separate issue.
I'd rather f*ck up than take advice.
Personally, I've never been opposed to f*cking up. Obviously, I'd rather avoid error, if I can. But I've never really felt ashamed of failure. And for that reason, I'm comfortable going with my gut, even if that means ignoring someone's advice.
Even if I make mistakes, I know I'm the one responsible for my actions. I feel secure knowing I will always have only myself to blame for my failures and congratulate for my successes.
I like having my own hands on the wheel, so to speak.
F*cking up teaches you valuable lessons.
Avoiding failure seems like a good idea. But by doing that, you'll never gain the special sort of knowledge and wisdom that only failure provides.
If learning a valuable lesson requires making a few errors along the way, I'm fine with that. In fact, I prefer it.
At the end of the day, life isn't about avoiding mistakes — it's about experience. And in order to experience as many things as possible, you need to ignore the people who are warning you about twists and turns down the line.
They may be right, but you won't learn from them as well as you will from yourself. A man can be taught how to fish, but he can also figure the process out by himself. And I guarantee that he will better remember his self-taught lessons.
F*cking up teaches you how to trust yourself.
If you're constantly taking other people's advice, you'll lose confidence in your own instincts. In order to be a truly independent thinker, you need to be willing to stand by your own views – even if they fall short down the road.
That's not to say you'll always be right, or that the people handing you advice will always be wrong. But you must learn to trust yourself.
By remaining true to your morals, you'll have less regret down the line. Personally, the biggest regrets I've had in life are those about things I didn't do, like not applying to a selective school or following up after an interview for fear of not being qualified.
When you're learning from your own failures, you'll be sure not to make them again. It's not as easy to learn from the mistakes of others, because you've never had to suffer the consequences.
F*cking up teaches you the value of taking risks.
As the great Wayne Gretzky once said, “You miss 100 percent of the shots you don't take.”
Sometimes people will urge you not to try something because of the risk of failure. But unless you take that risk, you'll never truly know what will happen. And sometimes you just have to throw caution to the winds and prepare to f*ck up.
If you put in the effort, you'll be able to fix any mistakes you make. But the doubt and uncertainty that comes from the things you chose not to do is usually much harder to shake.
And this only becomes much more frustrating when you realize you were blindly following the advice of someone else instead of your own gut.
F*cking up teaches you how to be independent.
By failing to heed advice, you're taking full responsibility for your decisions. Part of being independent is shouldering consequences.
If you want to fully stand on your own two feet, you need to be prepared to pick yourself up if you stumble.
And that's fine. Life is all trial and error, anyway. Believe me when I say you'll learn more when you stumble — not sitting on the sidelines and praying you don't get the chance to mess something up.
So yes, advice is valuable. But so are mistakes.
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