The 20 Defining Traits Of The Real Modern Man

The 20 Defining Traits Of The Real Modern Man
Life
Like Us On Facebook
Like Us On Facebook

I once dated a guy who was obsessed with the notion of masculinity. What did it look like? How did one embody it? Is it possible to exhibit the characteristics and still make a mean lemon meringue? I found a Google search in his history on the subject, and the top image results were of Brad Pitt, Chuck Norris, Drake and a lion — interpret that how you will.

Truthfully, the definition has been morphing over the years. With changing gender roles, the rising social acceptance of the metrosexual image and differing media depictions of the ideal boyfriend, husband and father, it’s no surprise that a lot of guys are having identity crises. I can tell you one thing: Masculinity no longer has anything to do with muscular calves or the ability to skillfully fix a leaky sink — though those are both a bonus.

Honestly, if you’re Googling “what it means to be a man,” there might be a few deeper issues you need to consider. But for the sake of confused men everywhere and every woman who has dated one, I’ll outline a few core characteristics.

1. Real men have a simple, classic standby cocktail or beer they can order with ease so as never to be the d-bag at the bar hemming and hawing indecisively while perusing a menu.

2. Real men also know your go-to drink by heart and make sure you never have an empty glass.

3. Real men can fix their own their mistakes. That means when they get lost, they swallow their pride and stop for directions.

4. Real men don’t dwell on their insecurities or fears, but acknowledge that they exist. Once in a while, they might even lower their guards and let you in on the things that scare them. But then, they’ll just get back to conquering them.

5. Real men think about their mothers, worry about their mothers and are grateful for their mothers.

6. Real men do not take selfies. The occasional ludicrous Snapchat, of course, being an exception.

7. Real men will never invite you back to their apartment unless it’s at least somewhat presentable.

8. Real men have at least two or three dishes they can cook well, just in case they need to impress you. Unless they have serious culinary prowess, they will probably make these meals during the first few months of dating and run out of options, so you better grow to love them.

9. Real men spend time putting themselves together, but never more than you.

10. Real men do not diet. They may attempt to eat healthier for various reasons, but this will never involve shunning entire food groups, dumping Splenda into their coffee and obsessively counting calories.

11. Real men call when it’s practical. Period.

12. Real men never tell the waiter “We’re all set,” when asked about dessert without consulting you. They look at you for the cue.

13. Real men are passionate about something — and it’s not just weed or their new Nikes.

14. Real men don’t need to make fun of other guys to boost their own self-confidence, but they can definitely make fun of themselves.

15. Real men have goals; they might seem lofty or completely absurd, but they’re working toward something, and that’s what matters.

16. Real men don’t take themselves too seriously. That’s why they can grow a ridiculous ‘stache for Movember and they can handle all of the harsh criticism from friends. They know deep down it’s for a good cause.

17. Real men will do things like carry your purse if need be or buy tampons. It may be awkward but they suck it up because they’re comfortable with their masculinity.

18. Real men don’t apologize if they don’t last long during sex, but they do make damn sure you get off.

19. Real men are not lovers or fighters — they are both, simultaneously.

20. Real men have had a dog, currently have a dog, or eventually, would like to have a dog.

Photo via Dangerous Complicity

Share Tweet
React
Like Us On Facebook
Like Us On Facebook

Rebecca Strong

After graduating college with a BA in Screenwriting, Rebecca moved to the heart of Hollywood. But it only took six months for her to realize that her heart was back in Boston: the city that loves to sleep, where the bars close at 2 a.m. and the temperature fluctuates 40 degrees day to day. When she's not writing full time for a content marketing agency, Rebecca can be found nursing a generous glass of shiraz with her eyes glued to the Bruins game or dominating the dance floor with moves from her glory days as hip hop team co-captain.

More In Life

Life Lauren Martin

Go To College, Cut Class: Those Who Skip Class May Get The Better Education

There are two ways to view education in this world. I’m not saying this to sound profound, poetic or because I want a deep opening paragraph. I’m saying it because that’s how the Oxford Dictionary defines it. In the Oxford Dictionary, education has two definitions. 1. The process of receiving or giving systemic instruction, especially at […]

Life Laura Argintar

17 FOMO Moments Every Post-Grad Gets When College Starts Up Again

Uh, does every day count? College is like an exquisite bubble in which the lines between work and play are blurred, your biggest worry is will there be enough vodka at the pregame? You feel so academically stimulated that you can actually justify the rest of your stupid behaviors. Our parents said it and yet […]

Life Dan Scotti

19 Reasons Why Nothing Will Ever Beat Going Back To Elementary School

Heading back to school, as an adult, just doesn’t have the same pizzazz that it once did. Sure, college is cool. You’ll return to your fraternity or sorority, and unlimited freedom from your parents. Yet, deep down, you know nothing will ever top heading back to elementary school as a kid. You didn’t have any […]

Life Sara Bosco

Parents Are Human, Too: Why We Need To Realize They Make Mistakes Just Like We Do

Do you remember when you first mastered every letter of the alphabet? Or had that epiphany when you realized teachers don’t actually live under their desks? Everyone experiences individual journeys of intellectual enlightenment, learning simple and complex truths through a series of life lessons, at school and otherwise. Some truths can seem, in the moment, […]

Wellness Sonya Matejko

Oh, Happy Day!: 13 Ways To Make Every Day Your Happiest Day

Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year. - Ralph Waldo Emerson Every day, as soon as we wake, we have the opportunity to create something magical. No matter what transpires with outward forces, the only thing that really matters is your attitude toward your own world. You have the […]

Also On Elite

LOL Lists

20 Times Yoga Balls Were Just Absolutely Awful When It Comes To Health

Whether you call them yoga balls, exercise balls or gym balls, the giant, air-filled rubber orbs that fill studios and office buildings around the world are surprisingly versatile for something that is literally a humungous sphere. For example: You can use them to strengthen your core while typing up reports in your cubicle at whatever […]

World

60-Year-Old Man Becomes Professional Dancer To Honor His Wife Who Passed Away

Glenn Bruno, 60, got the chance to live out his dream of being a professional dancer, thanks to London-based music producer Alex Metric. Metric casted Bruno for the music video to his song, “Heart Weighs A Ton,” and Bruno’s reasons for wanting to become a dancer are profound. The love of my life Robin passed […]

Women

Why Kim Kardashian Might Be The Perfect Face For Modern-Day Feminism

Kim Kardashian is definitely not the woman who comes to mind when you think “Feminist.” After all, she’s made a career on talking about her diet and injecting her lips with all sorts of chemicals, and most certainly spends more time in the makeup chair than she does actually sleeping in order to look like that each […]

Humor

An App That Only Sells Black V-Necks And Does Nothing Else Has Finally Arrived

As more and more apps flood the mobile marketplace every single day, we’re treated to a mixture of potentially life-changing technology located right next to games specifically designed to make small children buy electronic coins with their parents’ credit cards. As more and more people figure out how to cheaply and efficiently make software of […]