Trust is hard to come by. This is a difficult generalization to accept, seeing as trust is the foundation of all successful relationships in our lives. Who do you find worthy of your trust? Do you find yourself trustworthy? When you realize the true value of trust, it’s a bit of a rude awakening to consider the effects that trust has had, and can have, on your life and your relationships.
What do you consider trust? What does trust mean to you? There are various forms of trust and a wide range of defining factors dependent on the person. To me, trust means having faith in another to hold onto what you confide in them about, believing in their reliability, valuing their opinions and relying on their support. Who can you trust? Is there anyone that you feel entirely comfortable sharing your most coveted secrets with? Those who we trust are chosen wisely.
Trust is difficult to gain and give, seeing as disappointment comes too easily and too often. If your past is marked by incidences of trust betrayal, you are marked by those incidences, which makes it harder to instill your trust in the present.
Maybe it was a past lover you wholeheartedly trusted that betrayed you, or it was the fact that you came from a broken home that affected your trust in your own relationships, or you were betrayed by a close friend in the past, or maybe you find it difficult to trust others because you, yourself, are untrustworthy. As Harold MacMillan said, “A man who trusts nobody is apt to be the kind of man nobody trusts.” It is your experiences and self that reflect your ability to trust.
The unfortunate truth is that people look out for their own best interest, and often, their own best interest has no regard for what’s best for you. You might confide in a friend only to have your trust betrayed by them enlightening someone else on your personal business. You might trust a romantic partner only to become the victim of his or her infidelity.
You might rely on a parent to be there and support you when the going gets tough, only for them to turn you away. When the people we trust let us down, it is one of the greatest disappointments. We wonder why and for what good reason our confidant might have for crushing our faith and trust. We question the value of their friendship, and how much they value ours in return.
Whether you have been betrayed, or you are simply human, trust is hard to come by. While it may be hard to accept, trust cannot be ignored and is the most important ingredient in our relationships. Finding trust is about learning to fight, lessening the fear, letting your guard down and having faith. Just as it is a human characteristic to protect ourselves and be skeptical of trusting others, it is also human to make mistakes, and this is something we all need to remember.
We have to learn to forgive in order to learn to trust again. We have to be honest in order to allow others to have trust in us. Be a trustworthy person. Do not betray the trust of those who care about you and have the faith in yourself to think before you act and never hurt them. Recognize your past mistakes and vow to never make them again.
Accept the past mistakes of others, dismiss them and learn to open your heart and let your guard down. Trust is the foundation of all relationships. Do to others as you would want done to you, and you will find stability for firm, long-lasting relationships that you can rely on.