7 Warning Signs Your Friendship Won't Survive After College
Finding friends as an adult can be super hard, which is why the friends you make in college hold a special place in your heart. You'll appreciate them endlessly for the next four years as you all try to navigate adulthood and school together. As excited as you are that you were able to make new friends in college, that doesn't always mean they will remain your friends for life.
Sometimes, your college friendships turn out to be toxic, and you only hang out with because you needed someone. It's important to keep in mind that most of the time, you meet some really incredible keepers throughout your school years, but it's also true that some friendships have expiration dates on them. You can tell a friendship won't survive after college with these seven warning signs.
1. You Only Hang Out For Class
If you can look back on every time you guys were together and it had something to do with a class, you may be in trouble. Friends should want to hang out for no reason at all other than to be with each other. If you've only ever seen this friend in class, or even on a class-related outing, you probably won't have any solid reasons to see each other after graduation.
2. You're Connected Through A Friend
Sometimes, you become friends with someone because they are friends with your friends. In those cases, you can either break the barrier and get super close with that person, or simply maintain the relationship of having a mutual friend there whenever you hang. If it's kind of awkward when it's just the two of you alone, your personal friendship definitely isn't strong enough to last outside of college.
3. The Only Real Thing You Have In Common Is You Went To The Same College
If the only real thing you have in common is that you both go to the same school, that's not a strong enough bond to keep you two together forever. A strong friendship is based off of way more interests and similarities than that. You have to find something else that links you two, like a favorite TV show and hobbies.
4. You're Always Initiating The Hangs
If you're always the one to text or call for plans, it can get pretty old after awhile. Once you've graduated, you will have a million more things on your plate. You won't have time to keep tabs on your friend, and if you don't text, you know you won't ever hear from them.
5. You Go Semesters Without Talking
If you were inseparable one semester because you had a class together, but then the next semester you never see them, it's easy to say your friendship doesn't have much glue to keep it together. Sure, you may run into them at a party or on campus, and you both immediately fall back into chatting like no time has passed. But, it's crucial to make a continuous effort to keep your friends in your life, so seeing them on an occasional basis doesn't really cut it.
6. You Have Very Different After-College Plans
You can totally have a long-distance friendship, but only true friendships can make that sort of relationship last. A college friendship may not always be as strong as a childhood friendship, just because you only had four years to develop it. That doesn't mean you can't make it work, but it's definitely a lot harder. You have to work twice as hard to make it work post-graduation, and sometimes that effort just isn't worth it.
7. Over The Four Years You've Slowly Drifted Apart
If you were totally tight as freshmen roommates, but since then have kind of drifted, it's clear your friendship is slowly fading. Even if you thought this person was going to be your forever friend, and maybe even a bridesmaid in your wedding, the flame has died down a little. Don't beat yourself up; some friendships aren't meant to last forever.
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