Why Children Of Controlling Parents Make For Ruthless Entrepreneurs
As entrepreneurs, we absolutely hate being told what to do.
It’s not that we don’t want to be employees, it’s that we can’t. The mere thought of living in a controlled environment makes us sick.
Having to tell our bosses about everything we do — including when to eat, pee or take a deep breath — is a giant pain in the ass for us.
We can’t stand someone else having control over our decisions or lives. At least, not just for money.
We know we’re responsible adults (or we’re really good at pretending to be), so why would we need to report back to someone else about our every move?
Because they’re older and have more experience?
Although being an entrepreneur is still pretty boss (pun intended), it can create a few existential questions, as we live semi-rebellious lives, where authority figures are the enemy.
Why are we so set against having someone else above us, controlling us? Why can’t we stand following rules? Why do we always look for devious ways to get the job done your way instead of someone else’s way?
Because we were raised in households where we didn’t have control over our own lives.
Our parents loved us dearly, but unfortunately, manifested their love in very controlling manners. They put strict rules on our bed times, play times, social life and schooling.
Growing up, we didn’t have much control over our decisions, which in turn, made us subconsciously detest controlling environments.
We left the nest, so why would we want to keep living lives filled with control from someone (sometimes) older than us?
We’ve freed ourselves from the control at home, and we have no intention of coming back to it, even if we were paid to.
So, we choose a path of entrepreneurship, which allows us to have control over what we want to do, when we want to do it and, most importantly, how we want to do it.
Here is why children of controlling parents make for ruthless entrepreneurs:
If you ask successful entrepreneurs what the secret to success is, none of them will tell you money; instead, they’ll discuss motivation.
Our motivation, as children of controlling parents, is to never live in an environment similar to the one at home.
We know what it’s like to feel powerless over our lives, and it’s something we never want to go back to.
As entrepreneurs, this will help us stay strong in less successful moments of our journeys.
Our motivation will keep us moving forward when obstacles are thrown in our path, activating our creativity rapidly to find a solution.
When other entrepreneurs give up, we keep going.
We know how to separate problems and emotions.
Although we hated being controlled by our parents, we understand that it was their way of showing us how much they loved us.
Growing up, we rolled our eyes as our parents called us at our friend’s house, but we still showed them love because they showed it to us, too.
Therefore, we’ve grown to become very understanding individuals, separating the problems from the people.
We didn’t get mad at our parents for calling us non-stop; we got mad at their controlling issues.
As entrepreneurs, we know not to take things personally and to focus on the problem rather than the person behind it.
This helps us stand out from other entrepreneurs, as we know that business is business, and a smart business decision won’t always be positive for all parties involved.
We look at the numbers, facts and situations rather than our feelings for the other person, which makes us successful in tricky situations.
We’ve learned to shut our mouths (but still get things done).
If you’re in your 20s today, I think it’s safe to say that you were raised in a family household where the punishment for a bad act was a little slap behind the head or ear-pulling.
Although, at the time, this disciplinary method didn’t hold a very high standing in our eyes, the outcome of it is genius.
Controlling parents had an eye on everything we did growing up.
If we wanted to go outside, we could, but we had to bring our Walkie Talkies along or call from a payphone every hour or so to check in.
If we wanted to put on lipstick in class, we needed to get our parents’ approval first, because they somehow always found out what happened at school.
They were everywhere, and talking back was definitely not an option when we were caught in the act.
So, we’ve learned to shut our mouths in front of them, do whatever we wanted and face the consequences after.
In entrepreneurship, it helps us deal with competition and extremely bad clients in a very professional and efficient manner.
Where other entrepreneurs turn down difficult clients, we take them on gladly, as we are confident in our ability to bring them the best results, regardless of the method used.
When we’re faced with an ego-maniac competitor, we know to shut our mouths, nod and smile while we’re preparing the plan of action in the back of our heads.
Silence is golden, and we’re digging for gold in the quiet desert.
We’ve become control freaks.
Control freaks cannot work for other control freaks; it makes for a very bad energy. So, working for someone else is definitely out of the question.
Therefore, we embrace our inner control freak as entrepreneurs, making sure all our projects are done at near-perfect status.
We assume our parents’ roles in the factory or office, keeping everybody in line to meet deadlines and keep the company moving forward. We control others; they don’t control us.
We have a lot of patience (sometimes).
Since we couldn’t talk back to our parents, but still did what we wanted, we often received the two-hour talk about how rebellious we are.
Sitting for two hours without laughing, peeing, drinking, eating or talking is long, and we’ve developed a certain level of patience that is just perfect for entrepreneurship.
As an entrepreneur, being a good listener is a must-have skill in order to succeed.
Clients or investors need to feel like you care about their money, expertise or problems, and some of them will talk for hours when they find a listening ear.
They will also appreciate someone who attentively listens to them over someone who fidgets while they’re talking, which is what will give us the contract when our competitors can’t take it anymore.
This patience also comes in handy when we need to be patient for paperwork or negotiations, as we’ll look more humane when other entrepreneurs will do everything to rush the process.
Although we questioned our parents’ philosophy, it taught us to become ruthless entrepreneurs.
We might not have had it easy growing up, but it sure made life easier now that we’re adults.
What are some things your parents did when you were a child that helped your professional life today?