Lonely At The Top: Why Every Successful Person Has Plenty Of Haters
If you are going to be successful, you will have to get attention and when you get the right amount of attention, you will have to learn how to handle the haters and naysayers.
Trust me, there will be more people saying you can't than there will be cheerleaders and supporters. My wife and biggest supporter, Elena Cardone, describes it as a “ping”: that feeling you get when someone throws a dig at you, passes judgment or voices a little helpful criticism.
With the prevalence of social media, there is no shortage of people who will anonymously sling their hate, opinions and advice your way. Remember this rule: “Money and success follow attention and the right amount of attention comes with haters and naysayers.”
If you want success, you better learn how to attract attention and love your haters because without them, you won't make it.
My first real criticism came in 2008 after the economy had collapsed.
In an appearance on television I made the statement,
“The economy isn't the problem; it's the opportunity. Give me any company and I'll increase sales by 15 percent or more.” Haters came out of the woodwork saying, “Who does he think he is?”
I ended up with a TV show out of it.
After being a passenger involved in an emergency landing where I recorded a bird strike at JFK, I was placed on an FAA watch list for admitting I was using electronics upon take off.
Rather than bowing down to the criticisms of the FAA and being affected by the emails and criticisms that came, I used this as an opportunity to get national attention and fight for the rights of all flyers to use electronic devices. You're welcome.
Here are five things to remember about critics, naysayers and haters:
1. All naysayers are quitters.
The people who tell you that you can't do something are admitting they quit. “Become a multimillionaire? Yeah, right.” Naysayers are saying, “I'm a quitter and I am hoping you quit, too, because it will make sense of why I quit.”
2. Critics and naysayers are spectators.
Spectators rarely have success in their own lives because they are too busy watching the lives of the successful. Value correction and coaching, never value criticism or naysayers.
3. Never get emotional.
Stay rational when you are getting “pinged” by the haters and critics. If it weren't for your success, they would not be talking about you. Emotional people don't get anything done. Stay on course and stay rational.
4. Never fear the hater; fear those who listen.
It's not the person who spreads the doom that you need to fear, but rather, those who listen. Friends, family and people on your team who are so weak they buy into anything are more dangerous to you than the haters that spread the venom. Get rid of those who pass on critics' garbage.
5. Never waste a hater.
Haters and naysayers should not be wished away, but used as fuel to take you to the next level. Critics and haters inspire me to prove them wrong; I use them to get me to the next place.
There has never been a successful person who has walked this planet without being criticized or hated.I will leave you with this reminder: “One week they like me, the next week they hate me, both weeks I get paid.”
Photo Courtesy: Universal/American Gangster
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