The VP Debate Is So Boring All Anyone Can Talk About Is Mike Pence's Eyebrows
The first and only vice presidential debate is making us feel really glad that there's only going to be one vice presidential debate.
Republican Mike Pence and Democrat Tim Kaine are two mild-mannered midwestern white men and, oh boy, that does not make for great entertainment.
And yes, of course, debates are supposed to be about policy and discussing platforms and all of that kind of stuff.
But we can't deny our humanity. And we can't deny our complete boredom.
Luckily, there is one point of true fascination in this entire, droning debate: the eyebrows of Governor Pence.
Pence's eyebrows are strange and confusing. No one can fully figure them out.
Are they there? Are they just so bleach white you can't see them? Were they shaved off? Did they not grow in properly or did he do this himself?
So there you have it. We're not crazy. Pence's eyebrows are confusing.
Every so often there is a moment of excitement as these two even-tempered men start arguing with each other, but overall it's just a lot of level voices.
Which, you know, is a good thing! Much better than a raving lunatic screaming about his temperament!
But it's also a tradition of political debates that we are fascinated by candidates' appearances. This has been true since the first televised debate 56 years ago.
That debate was between John F. Kennedy and Richard Nixon in September 1960. What we saw then was that Kennedy looked, well, hot. He was tan, attractive and looked cool, calm and composed.
Nixon, on the other hand, looked to be the other type of hot. He was sweating up a storm. Everyone at home was kind of like "ew."
And from there on out, the American presidential election began it's slow descent into a reality television show. So here we are, telling you about the eyebrows of a man on the ticket with a man who is actually a reality TV host.
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