News

Why Ted Cruz Is The Justin Bieber Of Presidential Candidates

by John Haltiwanger
Facebook

Republican Senator Ted Cruz has formally announced he will be running for president in 2016, making him the first official candidate.

I am running for President of the United States to stand with each of you to reignite the promise of America #MakeDCListen — Ted Cruz (@tedcruz) March 23, 2015

Cruz, a hyper-religious conservative and proud member of the Tea Party, is the Justin Bieber of presidential candidates. He's Canadian, annoying, immature and out of touch with reality.

“There's nothing more American than being Canadian.” #TedCruzCampaignSlogans — Amber Royster (@OysterwithanR) March 23, 2015

Bieber is an embarrassment for Canadians. Comparatively, Cruz is so antagonistic, he's even disliked by members of his own party.

In truth, Cruz is an American citizen, but he was born in Canada (Calgary, specifically). His father, Rafael Cruz, is a Cuban national who eventually gained American citizenship. Cruz is still eligible to run for president under US law, however, as his mother, Eleanor Darragh, was a US citizen (born in Delaware).

So, sadly, much like Bieber, we're stuck with him.

Do you know what Ted Cruz and Justin Bieber have in common? They both were born in Canada. — Hawk (@ChrisHawkSalaz) March 23, 2015
After Justin Bieber and Nickelback, Ted Cruz is definitely Canada's worst export to the world. We're terribly sorry. — ChrispyTheSunBro (@ChrispyPaul) March 23, 2015

The fortunate aspect of this is Cruz will provide political journalists and comedians alike with endless material.

"Stop Laughing You Guys, I'm Serious!" #TedCruzCampaignSlogans — Ed Cates (@EdCates) March 23, 2015

Essentially everything Cruz says is at odds with the real world. Quite fittingly, he has already been characterized as the Sarah Palin of the 2016 election.

He says a lot of astronomically idiotic things, and he frequently makes false claims. One might say he exists solely to troll liberals.

An image Democrats (and some Republicans) are passing around online today #TedCruz pic.twitter.com/BrIPPwsXMs — Aman Batheja (@amanbatheja) March 22, 2015

He feeds off people's fear, telling his supporters the "world is on fire," which is somewhat ironic given his position on climate change.

Cruz rejects the scientific consensus the world is getting hotter and does not believe humans are contributing to climate change. Despite 2014 being the warmest year in recorded history, Cruz can't get on board with the idea temperatures are rising.

Cruz recently argued climate change is not occurring because there's still snow and ice in New Hampshire. The stupidity of this position cannot be overstated.

Global warming isn't real because I was cold today! Also great news: World hunger is over because I just ate. — Stephen Colbert (@StephenAtHome) November 19, 2014

Cruz also contended there's been no rise in temperatures in the past 17 years. This is fundamentally incorrect.

Why trust a scientist when you can make something up? #TedCruzCampaignSlogans — Sarah Tuttle (@niais) March 23, 2015

Consequently, Jerry Brown, California's governor, has called Cruz unfit to run for office, CNN reports.

In his view, it's irresponsible for any public official to deny the human impact on the environment and climate change.

In addition to neglecting the environment and ignoring science, here's what Cruz hopes to accomplish if he's elected president:

Imagine a federal government that protects the right to keep and bear arms for all law-abiding Americans. — Ted Cruz (@tedcruz) March 23, 2015
Imagine abolishing the IRS! #MakeDCListen — Ted Cruz (@tedcruz) March 23, 2015
Imagine millions of courageous conservatives rising up together to say, in unison, we demand our liberty! — Ted Cruz (@tedcruz) March 23, 2015
Five years ago today, the President signed Obamacare into law. Imagine in 2017, a new president signing a #FullRepeal of it! — Ted Cruz (@tedcruz) March 23, 2015
Imagine a federal government that stands for the First Amendment rights of every American! — Ted Cruz (@tedcruz) March 23, 2015

John Lennon called; he wants his song back.

Does Cruz actually have a chance of winning? Only time will tell. At the moment, however, it seems about as likely as Justin Bieber winning the Nobel Peace Prize.

Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not reflect the official position of Elite Daily.

Citations: Ted Cruz Is About To Announce For President Heres What You Need To Know About Him (Think Progress), Seth Meyers Confronts Ted Cruz On Climate Change (Think Progress), 2014 Warmest Year in Modern Record (NASA), Can Ted Cruz Win (Vox), Who Is Running For President And Whos Not (The New York Times), Can Canadian born Ted Cruz run for president (Vox), What You Need To Know About Ted Cruz (NPR), Whats Wrong With Ted Cruz (Washington Post), The Paranoid Style Of Ted Cruz (The Atlantic ), Ted Cruzs File (Politifact ), Ted Cruzs Worlds On Fire But Not For The Last 17 Years (Politifact), Cruz is absolutely unfit for office (CNN)