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The Only Witness In This Insane Murder Case Is A Talking Parrot

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I'm not sure whether to laugh about this story or be extremely bummed out. I have chosen a hybrid of the two. I'm am officially "laughemely bummed."

What happened is this: Martin Duram and his wife, Glenna, were both shot in their Michigan home last spring. Glenna survived, but sadly, Martin succumbed to his injuries.

Police currently suspect Glenna of the crime. To support this accusation, Martin's parents have brought forward the family parrot as a witness.

No, you did not read that incorrectly. According to them, the parrot, who's name is Bud, has been imitating the events of that violent spring night.

“That bird picks up everything and anything,” Martin's mother explained. Namely, the bird allegedly keeps repeating, “Don't f*cking shoot!”

Now, this bird will surely not be entered into a courtroom trial as evidence, because of course this is not a cartoon or a live-action '90s movie called "Caw and Order." (OK, come on — that pun is legendary.)

But the evidence seems stacked against Glenna, who apparently wrote three different suicide notes that night — but claims not to remember anything that happened.

Citations: Cosmopolitan (Cosmopolitan)