If You Do This One Thing (You Definitely Do), You're Pooping Wrong

I know it's not something we all love talking about, but let's just discuss pooping for a hot sec.

We all do it at least once a day, but there's a high chance you're totally screwing it up -- unless someone sits with you in the bathroom to coach you on how to poop properly, that is. Are poop coaches a thing?

Anyway, one of the glaring pooping mistakes you're making has to do with how you sit. But guess what? It's not actually your fault. Blame modern plumbing for our poor pooping posture.

See, the toilets we use today were designed with convenience and aesthetic in mind. If toilets were made for proper pooping, they would probably just be holes in the ground.

When you go number two, you probably sit with your legs bent somewhat at a right angle at the knee. Sitting like this actually makes pushing necessary, and that strain can cause damage to your bum hole, like hemorrhoids. No one wants that.

The way we were actually supposed to have bowel movements looks a little different. Robynne Chutkan, MD and author of "The Bloat Cure" says,

We were designed to squat to poop. When we squat, the knees press up against the abs, which increases intra-abdominal pressure to help stool evacuate.

So apparently, we should all be crouching up on top of the toilet instead of sitting like civilized poopers. I mean, if you did squat on top of the toilet with your knees pressing up against your abs, no one would know. That is assuming you go number two with the door closed...

But that's not the only mistake we make. Other things to watch out for are taking too long and holding it in. Doing so trains your bowels to delay the whole process, which can cause constipation, among other problems.

Also, if you're not taking a glance at your poop after you're done, you could be missing signs that something is wrong with your body. The way it looks differs based on how healthy you are. I'm not saying you should examine it for 10 minutes, just a quick look will do.

And apparently your wipes should be pretty squeaky clean. If you still have some... uh... stuff on the TP after you're done pooping, that probably means you have some more work to do.

So, there you have it. Now you have something to think about next time you go number two other than the crossword puzzle you took in with you.

Citations: How to Poop the Right Way (And Yes, There's a Right Way) (Shape)