Ah, another weekend and another work week for the books. Finally, our two days of freedom have arrived!
Now, we can escape our cubicles, rip off our lady suits and put on something more ourselves, while we embark on what the weekend holds in store for us.
As soon as we step out of our office at the end of the day, we instantaneously feel rejuvenated. We can finally catch up on our sleep — yeah, right, who are we kidding? We’re going out and seeing our friends.
We hit up all our girl friends via group text (obviously) and decide what the move is for the much anticipated weekend.
We’ve only been dreaming of Friday, yearning for Saturday and anxiously awaiting Sunday since the beginning of the work week.
This time will be spent contemplating outfits while simultaneously trying not to cut your legs while shaving. You run over the possible night options and, of course, debate if you’re actually going to go out or give up and stay in.
You don’t know why you thought planning your outfit in the shower was going to work out in your favor. You tried that outfit on, hated it and then proceeded to try on essentially everything hanging in your closet.
Everything is now spread out all over your floor, but who cares? You finally got your outfit together.
You and your army come together to start the nights festivities. Because, honestly, who could even afford to show up to a bar or club sober — drinks are expensive!
Plus you can’t show up by yourself, you need a group to go out with. You spend two hours taking shots and spitting gossip.
As fun and cool as you think your group of friends are, the doorman really just doesn’t give a sh*t. He’s already dealt with over three groups of the exact same nature.
He doesn’t care who you are, he just wants what’s in your wallet. Give him your ID and make sure you aren’t the person who bitches over cover.
When girls get drunk, they turn into Beyoncé — no, scratch that, they turn into Destiny’s Child. Dancing in little clumps, waving their clutches and basically having the best night ever. Goodbye work week and hello hangover; let the vicious cycle continue.
No one has either the patience or the desire to waste calories on beer, so obviously shots are the way to go. You do this basically every time you go out and regret it every single morning.
If you go out and don’t take any pictures, did the night even happen? “No it didn’t,” you tell yourself as you put on Thursday night’s outfit.
You fight with your friend over who gets to post the picture on Instagram first, as you agree to just take two different ones. Besides without pictures, how else are you supposed to remember your night?
Yes, because shouting in a girl’s face is totally going to get her to talk to you. On any given night, one girl in the group will have an encounter with someone she will label a “creep.”
The difference between calling someone a creep and seeing him as a viable option is basically determined by how attractive he is. Don’t try and deny this either, we all know it’s true.
The only reason you hit up a guy while you’re out is that the six tequila shots you had told you to do so. You think this is a great idea since he is probably drunk as well.
Except it’s really awkward when he didn’t go out and is sitting on his couch getting high with his friends as they laugh at your text.
Late nighting can be even more fun than the night itself, as you and your friends are all sorts of f*cked up. This includes late night dance parties, smoke sessions, a food festival or just a group hangout.
Did you really have a great night if there wasn’t pizza involved? Are you really, truly single if you didn’t wake up spooning an empty box? Enjoy the only walk of shame you will be taking part in the following morning: the trek to the trash shoot.
Sure, this isn’t technically part of your night out, but it doesn’t mean the hangover isn’t a crucial aspect of that timeline.
All of your nightly events have led up to the terrible moment when you are curled in the fetal position, swearing you’ll never go out again — yeah, okay, until next week that is.
Photo via We Heart It
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