13 Lies All Women Tell Each Other To Feel Better… Whether They Believe Them Or Not

13 Lies All Women Tell Each Other To Feel Better… Whether They Believe Them Or Not
Women
Like Us On Facebook
Like Us On Facebook

I love the bond between women. The way they will sit there while you cry, hold your hair back when you’ve drunk your weight in vodka and always tell you exactly what you need to hear… even if it’s on the other side of the truth.

Women wholeheartedly believe and live by the power of the white lie. Its power rests in its ability to provide comfort rather than truth. Because who would want to hear the truth when they can hear exactly what they want and need to hear?

It’s the bad habit we all share and will never quit. It’s the one vice we say we can’t tolerate, yet will accept with open arms in our times of need. It’s the one thing we do for each other when we really can’t do anything else.

It’s the only way to comfort each other when we truly don’t know what to say or do. It’s the one time you hope that your friend will just be a pal and lie straight to your face.

Many times we know they are lying when they say it. We know the truth and they know it, but we need to hear someone tell the lie to put our worried minds at ease, if only for a few brief moments. Because it’s much harder to lie to yourself than to have someone else do it for you.

Because this is a sisterhood founded on lies… and we like it that way. We’re believers in sparing feelings over spreading truth, and we understand that sometimes a lie is the best thing for the soul.

He’s not worth it

Sometimes he is, though. But if she can’t have him, she may as well not know it. Even if he has the body of Channing Tatum and the eyes of Rob Lowe, she can never know that she watched the best man she’ll probably ever get slip through her unwanted fingertips.


You look fine

You’ve definitely looked better. Actually, you look pretty horrible, but I don’t feel like going all the way back to your room and waiting for you to put on more eyeliner and blush.


No, I’m not mad

I’m f*cking pissed. If you have to ask me if I’m mad at you, chances are I probably am. But because I’m a woman and I hate hurting your feelings, I’m going to shove my disdain deep into my empty womb and tell you it’s all good.


She’s just a bitch

If you hate her, then she’s a bitch. She’s probably not and you’re probably overreacting, but I know what you want to hear, so I’ll throw the “B” word out if it’s going to make you feel better. I mean it’s nothing like the “C” word.


He’s going to call

I have no idea if he’s going to call. By now, chances are he’s probably not picking up his phone. But you’re standing dangerously close to the edge and if some false hope is what it’s going to take to bring you down, I’ll spoon feed it to you.


She’s not that hot

She might be beautiful, but I know you better — and that makes you better. Besides, if she’s the girl who took your man then I know you need to hear how ugly she is. Even if she’s got the face of Megan Fox, her soul is one ugly motherf*cker.


It’s not a big deal

It was a big deal, but I’m over it now. Clearly this was something I was upset about, but I’m letting it go because you are apologizing now, but just know… it was a big deal.


It was a good experience

Experience is the pretty stepsister of mistake. Having some guy f*ck you then never call you isn’t an experience, it’s a serious blow to the ego. But let’s wrap it up, tie a bow around it and call it a silver lining.


He’s an assh*le

Most of the time he probably is, but sometimes he’s just a guy who didn’t want to go out with you anymore. But you’re my friend and anyone who doesn’t want to go out with you is an assh*le in my eyes, even if he really is a nice guy.


He’s just busy

…So busy he can’t take 20 seconds and send you a, “Hey, what’s up?” You know what it means when he’s not texting, but she doesn’t need to know. In these situations, ignorance is always bliss.


It’ll take 15 minutes

Or an hour. But once you agree to getting there with me, what’s 30 minutes more? We’re already out, we’re already doing this, so do you really need to know the exact amount of time going into it?


We just hooked up

I didn’t define what hooked up means, thus it can really mean anything. Adding the “just” takes away from the idea that we had sex… however, I could really be saying, “We just had sex.”


 I don’t like him that much

I’m obsessed with him and think about him all the time, but I don’t want to let on because that means admitting it to myself, which means admitting that he could really hurt me. I like to tell myself, and everyone else, that I’m just playing the field.

Photo Courtesy: We Heart It

Share Tweet
React
Like Us On Facebook
Like Us On Facebook

Lauren Martin

Lauren “LMoney” Martin grew up with one goal: to be the first woman engineer. Upon finding out there already were women engineers, and unable to pass Calc 1, she chose to study the beautiful and honorable art of advertising. After advertising proved uninspiring, she attempted a career in acting which was over before she could get on stage. And when she failed at everything else she decided to become a writer.

More In Women

Women Cara Kovacs

Remembering Oscar De La Renta: How The Timeless Designer Will Live On

Oscar de la Renta’s name is synonymous with timeless, mesmerizing style. With a career that spans over half a century, the Dominican-American fashion icon dressed everyone from first ladies and Academy Award winners to women like you and me, who were lucky enough to find his pieces at high-end consignment stores. With an incomparable knack […]

Women Alex Schnee

25 Things That Scare 20-Something Women More Than Ebola

With the recent outbreak of Ebola in the news, it can be easy to get caught up in what the media says, and wonder how far the disease will spread. What most people don’t know, however, is that the women of Generation-Y have quite a bit to deal with already. We have concerns that are […]

Also On Elite

Humor

Epic Movie Trailer Voice Brings Excitement To The Food Court (Video)

It’s been a while since we’ve shared anything from the Epic Movie Trailer Voice guy, so it’s about time to bless you with his newest video. In the latest prank by YouTube channel Break, voice-over master Jon Bailey hits up the food court at Universal CityWalk in LA. It’s not so much a prank as […]

World

Former ISIS Member Says Girls As Young As 9 Years Old Are Forced Into Marriage

A former member of the Islamic State (ISIS) has revealed that members of the group force girls as young as 9 years old to become their wives. The communications technician told Your Middle East that because Muhammad, the prophet of Islam, married his wife when she was just 9 years old, the militants consider anyone […]

Dating

10 Things You Need To Be Sure About Before You Can Say ‘I Do’

I’m young, and when it comes to the topic of lifelong love, it will be an eternity before I feel anything but young in that regard. I will never have all of the answers; marriage is such a unique and complex entity. It starts out as this distant thought that most people think of very […]

Strategy

Business, Man: Why Millennials Need To Care About The Stock Market

If you are anything like me when it comes to your finances, you probably have more than five finance-related apps, which is at least five more than your average Joe has. There is something about finance that just makes me feel right. I mean, it could be that having a portfolio that has given me […]

Life

10 Times Mercury In Retrograde Completely F*cked Up Your Life

Mercury is in retrograde and it’s ruining our lives. Things that used to come easy to us, like this post, are now slowing to a halt. Frustrations are abound. In general, life sucks more. And it’s all because the planet Mercury has decided to put its name down, flip it and reverse it. Everything from […]

World

Ebola Demystified: Everything You Need To Know About The Deadly Disease

Amidst the largest-known outbreak of the Ebola virus, we learned this year that travel and transmission of the disease is very much possible from one continent to another. Should you be afraid of this virus? Or, is all the news sensationalized to keep you entertained? Let me put it into context: During medical school, residency […]