27 Things Only Your Roommate Would Never Judge You For
The relationship between roommates is a special bond unlike that of any other. They see you on a constant basis and probably more than anyone else in your life.
You share your home with them, the most sacred of places where you can relax and be yourself. There’s no room for judgments here because if you can’t be yourself in your own home, where else are you expected to?
Your roommate is caught up on all your latest drama, knows your quirks and tendencies and loves you as the person you truly are.
Most conversations the two (or three) of you have, begin with, “Don’t judge me but…” or “This may be weird but…” Feel free to say and ask what you please because at the end of the day, your roommate is stuck with you, anyway!
Here are 27 things only your roommate will appreciate and understand!
1. Ordering three dinners on Seamless in one night
It’s okay to have those nights when your stomach seems to be a bottomless pit. Your roommate understands, as she is more than likely to have been in the same position the night before. Bring on the delivery!
2. Using perfume on your clothes instead of washing them
You’re a busy, busy girl who doesn’t always have time to do (or send out) her own laundry! Spray a little perfume here and there and you’re good to go. No one will realize you’re wearing the same pair of leggings you were wearing yesterday, anyway.
3. Going out more often than you stay in
You may be a hot mess, but it’s okay because your roommate accepts you for who you are.
4. Passing out drunk anywhere other than your bed
We all have those nights when all we want to do after drinking is pass out. Unfortunately, sometimes our beds are just a little too far away from the apartment door. It’s a sad fate most of us face at one time or another, and one your roommate will never judge you for.
5. Farting, burping and any and all other bodily functions
“Better out than in,” they always say! But hey, guys, if you’re reading this, girls don’t do any of these things…
6. Overhearing phone calls
The walls are thin in most apartments, and whether you like it or not, you may overhear your roommate’s conversations. Whether it’s your roomie getting into a screaming match with a parent, or having phone sex with a long-distance boyfriend, this is a judgment-free zone.
7. Not having any food in the apartment besides leftovers, some Lean Cuisines and tequila
Am I the only one who will eat every single item in the kitchen after food shopping? Having no food results in excessive Seamless orders — spending money you don’t have on food you probably shouldn’t be eating, anyway.
8. Walking around au naturel
The best part about living away from your family is that you can walk around in the nude! Buh-bye, pants! Buh-bye, bra!
9. Smoking alone in your bedroom
Some people like to have wine before they go to bed; whereas, others like to smoke endless bowls. Whatever it takes to ensure a solid night’s sleep is a go in this apartment.
10. Never making your bed or cleaning your room
Uh, what’s the point of making the bed if you’re getting back into it at the end of the day? Exactly.
11. Skipping the gym
Sometimes indulging in a platter of penne alla vodka seems so much more enticing than an hour on the elliptical.
12. Obsessing over “Vampire Diaries,” “Pretty Little Liars” or any other shows made for teens
Tuesday night is reserved for “PLL,” while Thursday is reserved for Stefan, Damon and Elena.
13. Bringing home a solid four after a night out
Everyone has a nasty encounter with beer goggles. It’s okay; it happens to the best of us (at least that’s what we tell ourselves.)
14. Throwing up after a night of partying too hard
Luckily (hopefully), you have a roommate who will sit with you and hold your hair back as you throw up everything you ingested the night prior.
15. Calling your mom far too often
At what point is it too much? Three times a week? Once a day?
16. Not knowing how to do your laundry
Thank god for delivery service! I mean, it’s definitely worth the $.75 per pound.
17. Lying on the couch for hours on end without any sign of moving
It doesn’t matter that it’s a beautiful day outside. If you want to spend it on the couch, more power to you.
18. Complaining about the most inconsequential, trivial things
Your roommate may (and probably is) tuning you out, but it’s basically her job to listen to you complain. You’ll do the same when she needs to whine.
19. Blasting depressing music after a romantic downfall
This is one of the best ways to deal with heartbreak: indulge in your emo music. It’s okay by your roommate’s standards.
20. Eating like sh*t all day
What’s better than not being judged for stuffing your face all day long? The fact that your roommate will more than likely join you.
21. Re-wearing the same outfit as the night before
If no one Instagrammed a picture of you, did you ever really wear that outfit? Nope! Repeat!
22. Showering for an hour
It’s okay your roommate hasn’t showered in three days; she’s making up for it now!
23. Listening to One Direction while getting ready to go out
Whatever gets you through the motions is okay by roommate standards. She won’t judge you, and you won’t judge her.
24. Sleeping with your ex… again
Your roommate has heard you bitch and moan about your ex far too many times to count. You know you shouldn’t be sleeping with him again, but oops! There you go. It’s basically an unwritten rule that your roommate must listen to you vent. She may get annoyed at you, but she sure isn’t judging you.
25. Talking sh*t about your best friend
You have to vent to someone!
26. Sleeping in an outfit you plan on wearing tomorrow
Sleep is valuable, so to earn yourself 20 more minutes the following morning, it only makes sense to sleep in your clothes.
27. Using paper towels in the absence of toilet paper
Sometimes, you and your roommate are both so busy, you forget to stock up on toilet paper. Unfortunately, you don’t realize this until it’s too late.
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