Many people (including me) speak about “self-love”: figure yourself out, love yourself before you get into a relationship… and so it goes.
However, you only truly obtain self-love by having compassion for the self, so you can appreciate and do considerate deeds for others.
Along my path to learn about myself and work on my own self-love, I discovered several major truths that still resonate with me and support my personal effort.
I am a constant work in progress, as most of us are. To help you gain more perspective and have a foundation on which to begin your journey of self-love, here are 30 truths to remember:
1. Stop comparing yourself to others. People achieve success and fail at different rates.
2. You’re not as fat as you think. Besides, your body fat percentage has no bearing on what makes you a quality human being.
3. Exercise because it is good for your soul and not solely for your outward experience. Appreciate your body and all the things it can do. Stop picking it apart — you will never achieve perfection.
4. Find something at which you excel. Maybe you are really amazing at working with kids and you just don’t know it yet.
5. Spend more time with your girlfriends or guy friends. Relationships may come and go, but friends are forever — cherish that.
6. Spend time alone. It’s okay if you want to stay home on a Friday night, catch up on your DVR and eat froyo because you’ve had an exhausting workweek.
7. Read that book you’ve been meaning to read. In fact, read as many books as possible. Reading expands the imagination and sharpens the mind.
8. Spend time outside. Discover a new trail or a mountain to hike. Soak up the sun.
9. Take a lot of pictures. Take way too many and don’t forget to print them. Don’t let them just sit in your phone memory.
10. Let go of the past. Forgive the people who hurt you so that YOU can move on. Carrying around anger only poisons you.
11. Reunite with old friends from high school, college and your past in general. Let go of friendships that no longer serve you. People grow apart; it’s natural and it’s okay.
12. Call your friends and family more often; don’t just follow them on social media. Remember when we used to have to call or meet up with people to hear their voices? That experience is so much richer.
13. Resolve the issues you might have with your family. Tell them you love them. Show up to family events and don’t have something better to do.
14. Take vitamins because you want to be the healthiest version of yourself. Unless you want to be cranky and lethargic all day, make sure you get enough iron.
15. Treat yourself to something you want but don’t need. Whether it’s a fancy designer purse you’ve been eyeing for years or a plane ticket to the destination of your dreams, remember how fine the line between saving and living is. Toe it.
16. Care about your appearance — not in a vain, superficial way. Care about how you look, so you can feel great when you leave the house. But, if you feel like wearing sweatpants and your hair in a bun to the grocery store once in a while, go f*cking do it.
17. Watch that movie or that Netflix series you’ve been meaning to see.
18. Be active. Exercising regularly releases endorphins and contributes to your level of happiness and will help you feel better about yourself.
19. Pick up a hobby. My roommates and I ordered paint-by-numbers from Amazon. It made me feel creative and allowed for some roommate bonding time.
20. Save up money and travel somewhere new. Try the sunrise at the top of Mount Haleakala in Maui. You will literally feel like you are in heaven.
21. Laugh at yourself. If you trip over your feet or realize your shirt is on inside out, don’t worry about it and make it a joke.
22. Do karaoke. Do it sober. Do it drunk. Sing. I read somewhere that the more you sing, the happier and healthier it will make you.
23. Eat less processed food. If you actually knew what was in that sh*t, you would be disgusted. Watch the documentary “Food Inc.” But, if you want to have fries, with extra, extra ranch sometimes, do it.
24. Dance. Freak Dance. Weird Dance. Make up a dance routine with your friends like you did when you were 12. Stop caring about what you look like. Have fun.
25. Smile more. The more you smile, the happier you will feel. It makes others happier, too — trust me.
26. Do favors and don’t expect anything in return from the kindness in your heart.
27. Guard your heart, but be open. Don’t let people take advantage of you.
28. Be less judgmental. “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.”
29. Look up at the sky. Realize that sunsets are gorgeous. Look at the stars, as they’re pretty incredible, too.
30. You will never be able to please everyone. Not everyone will like you. You won’t like everyone you meet. That’s perfectly fine also.
Love yourself. Enjoy the life you have been given, and embrace each day with open arms as the best version of you.
Always remember this quote by Buddha:
“You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.”
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