Signs Carrie Bradshaw (And, Cough, Some Other People We Know) Should Not Have Ended Up With Mr. Big…

Signs Carrie Bradshaw (And, Cough, Some Other People We Know) Should Not Have Ended Up With Mr. Big…
Women
Like Us On Facebook
Like Us On Facebook

In celebration of Chris Noth‘s 59th birthday today, let’s all put our mutual hatred for Carrie Bradshaw aside for a moment and examine this fact: At some point or other in our love lives, we have all dated a Mr. Big character.

He’s the guy who already has two ex-wives and doesn’t tell you when he makes life plans — red flags all around, especially you, Carrie!

First, we applaud the women who accurately read the (blatant) signs that they should not have ended up with this Mr. Big character. Duh, after we caught him looking at other women over dinner way too early on in the game, we knew he wasn’t the guy for us.

We hate Carrie because she’s The Girl who falls for the smoke and mirrors and doesn’t recognize the obvious: Mr. Big suuuuuuuucks!!!

And we know this girl, too. She’s the one we say, “I cannot believe she ended up with _____ (insert obvious Mr. Big character here). He’s such a prick.”

Don’t want to risk being humiliated on your wedding day or entertaining thoughts of The One Who Got Away in Dubai (AIDAN! You are so stupid, Carrie!)? Here are the signs that Mr. Big wasn’t right for Carrie all along (…or why Carrie should have ended up with Aidan).

Classic Dick Move: Rebounding With Natasha

Blogspot

There are so many things wrong with this one. First off, Mr. Big couldn’t commit to Carrie, his longtime girlfriend, but he somehow was able to get engaged to Natasha in record time? Not to mention she’s pretty effing gorgeous and way younger. So typical.

Big reminds us of the ultimate douche meets ultimate shady dude. Come on, Carrie!


Mr. Big Didn’t Introduce Carrie To His Family

If he is evasive about meeting the family, then he isn’t taking the relationship seriously. This one is a no-brainer.


Mr. Big Was A Cheater

You know that saying, “You can’t see what’s happening right in front of you”? That’s how we feel about this one. He wouldn’t leave Natasha for you, Carrie. Oooh, burn.


The Girls Didn’t Like Him

Samantha, Charlotte and yes, – we hate to admit it – Miranda, were funny and smart women. Their opinions were usually correct, and in this case, their unease with Big was spot on.


Mr. Big Was A Shady Dude

Mr. Big photo Sex-And-The-City-sex-and-the-city-24495043-350-263_zps4a63ac58.gif

Uhhh, what’s with not knowing his first name until six years later? Is this some Witness Protection shizz? Ick, not slick.


Mr. Big Left Carrie At The Altar

This move only worked out in “Runaway Bride” because it was Richard Gere and Julia Roberts; not pimple-chin-Parker and over-the-hill-eternal-bachelor-Big.


He Didn’t Have Any Friends

See: signs he’s a shady dude. Aidan had Steve. Smith Jared had an entourage. Mr. Big barely had some stuffy, clear-liquids-only acquaintances and his driver. There’s a reason why no one likes him.


He Had To Lose Carrie To Realize He Loved Her

Really? Flying halfway around the world to Paris to profess your love? Your ship has sailed, Mr. Big! Should have appreciated her while you had the chance!


Bad Gift Giver

Big gave Carrie a completely thoughtless, diamond swan purse because he had no idea what she liked.


Big Never Tried To Understand Carrie

Buzzfeed

It took Carrie writing an entire book for Big to appreciate her needs. Scumbag.

Top photo courtesy of Sex And The City

Share Tweet
React
Like Us On Facebook
Like Us On Facebook

Laura Argintar

Laura Argintar is a Senior Women's Editor at Elite Daily, comedienne and low-key science nerd. Listed among her achievements are performing stand-up throughout New York City, graduating with honors from the University of Michigan with a Bachelor of Science and being the first woman in history to twerk at a 2 Chainz concert. LARG – as her friends call her – enjoys covering women’s topics, watching celebrities self-destruct and rising to any occasion.

More In Women

Women Emily Arata

Mom Hilariously Rips Apart Unrealistic Stock Photos Of Motherhood

Sara Given knows that parenting and managing a growing family isn’t always picturesque. Given realized she couldn’t bear to see one more stock photograph of a woman breastfeeding while in a meeting and getting a manicure. The Ohio mother started a Tumblr called “It’s Like They Know Us,” dedicated to the most unrealistic stock photography […]

Women Gillian Fuller

Powerful Short Film Shows What It Really Means To Be A Feminist

Yesterday, Emma Watson spoke to the United Nations and delivered an incredibly empowering speech on what being a feminist means to her. The actress brought to light an important truth: That we, as a collective, need to talk about feminism. There are still so many myths and stereotypes surrounding the word. Writer and director Inny Taylor […]

Women Emily Arata

Respected Female Doctor Says Women On Their Periods Shouldn’t Make Big Decisions

A prominent United Arab Emirates (UAE) doctor shocked female professionals yesterday by reportedly proclaiming that women should avoid making important decisions while on their periods. Dr. Maryam Matar is internationally recognized as the founder of UAE Genetic Diseases Association and respected as a female leader. In front of a gathered crowd at Dubai’s annual Arab Women in […]

Also On Elite

World

Baby Elephant Has Some Serious Ribbon Dancing Skills (Video)

Elephants are apparently masters of ribbon dancing and rhythm gymnastics. Recent footage captured by tourists shows Faa Mai, a baby elephant who was rescued and currently lives at the Elephant Nature Park in Thailand, showing off in front of friends with a large blue ribbon. The intriguing baby elephant does tricks with the ribbon, spinning […]