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The Most Shockingly Tasteless Halloween Costumes You’d Never Want Your Daughter To Wear

We understand that, at a certain age, Halloween ceases to be an innocent day for us to play dress-up and instead becomes a night for us to wear our most revealing, vulgar and inappropriate outfits. But there’s a line that needs to be drawn — wearing your bra and thong and putting a nun’s habit on your head is not okay, and for obvious reasons.

Halloween is about ghoulishly scaring your friends, not scaring your parents with your barely-there costume. We’ve come across some pretty shocking clothing choices before (see: socks and sandals, ahhh the horror!), but these “sexy” costumes really take the pumpkin.

Hot Miley Cyrus

Pop Cults

Honestly, it was bad enough the first time and any imitation will only be much, much worse. Don’t validate her crazy behavior anymore by wearing her ensemble.


Hot Tribal Indian

Tumblr

How is that headdress even remotely sexy? Who is going to want you when you’re sprouting feathers out of your head like a peacock? And, if you’re a politically correct kind of person, there is especially something wrong with “sexifying” a Native American.


Hot Cop

PaulinaGretzky

This isn’t a costume, it’s a bathing suit that costs more money than an actual bra and underwear would. You are not only stupid for purchasing a $70 piece of latex that should never be worn period, but you are also stupid for thinking you are fooling anyone with putting a hat on your head and calling yourself a “cop.” You are not dressing up as a cop; you are dressing up as a porn star.


Hot Carrot Top

Craftster

This just misses the mark so hard. At least if you’re trying to dress like a sloot on Halloween, own up to it. Don’t disguise yourself in something innocent and platonic, like a carrot.


Hot, Wait? WTF Is This?

Yandy
This isn’t even a real costume! Who are you supposed to be? Did you forget that you’re supposed to dress-up as something on Halloween, not just a slootier version of yourself? Nice effort with the long sleeves, though.


Just Plain Old Sexy

Tumblr
We actually double dare someone to wear this because that’s the only reason you should wear solely furry suspenders to the next Halloween party.


Hot C-E-Ho

Tumblr

Really? What is this world coming to? A sexy CEO? Women are still struggling to be taken seriously in the boardroom — this costume just set us back a few.


Hot “Monster”

Style Hive

The details say that this is a “sexy pink puff monster” costume. Huh? This doesn’t even make sense — “pink puff” should not be used to describe a “monster.” But this is frightening enough to make us never want to go Halloween shopping again…Oh wait, we just found out that it comes in a deluxe version. #FacePalm


Hot Squid

Costume Supercenter

This isn’t slooty. It’s terrifying. There are so many things wrong with the idea of sexy squid, beginning with the tentacles coming out of her ass.


Hot Edward Scissorhands

Costume Supercenter

We’re sure you’re going to get a lot of guys with those kinds of gloves on. Maybe try offering him a hand job.


Hot Mardi Gras

Costume Supercenter
Um, wrong holiday dum-dum. Save it for the slooty parade.


Hot Nurse

Random Fun Stuff
This is meant for the privacy of you and your significant other. They forgot to put “do not wear outside of the house if you want to be taken seriously” on the packaging.


Hot Tiger

Forplay Catalog
Honestly why bother wearing a costume at all? Pretty sure we all know what your tits look like now regardless.


Hot ‘Apple Bottom Country Girl’

Yandy
If we stand far away enough, we can’t tell if she has pepperoni nipples or if those are apples. At least it’s in the same red food family!


Hot Skunk

Photobucket

Is this a joke? If you’re trying to dress up in a sexy costume, why in the world would you choose outfitting yourself as a skunk? Not to mention it looks like this feline took a dump under her tail. But actually, why?


Hot Light Up Pussy

Costume Supercenter

If we were to wear this we probably wouldn’t be able to resist yelling, “my pussy shines just for you!” The spotlight is literally on your vagina — your labia is the star of the show. Congrats, we guess?


Hot BJ University

Amazon

This is so obvious it hurts. You might as well paste a sign to your chest that says, “I will give you head tonight.” Or is completing full sentences challenging for you? Wait, you went to BJ University?! Can we play Jewish Geography with you?


Hot Whipped Cream

Blogspot

Trying a little too hard…(shakes head).

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Laura Argintar

Contributor

Laura Argintar is the Senior Women's Writer at Elite Daily. Listed among her achievements are performing stand-up, graduating from the U of M and writing for her favorite publications. LARG enjoys covering women’s topics, watching celebrities ...
Laura Argintar is the Senior Women's Writer at Elite Daily. Listed among her achievements are performing stand-up, graduating from the U of M and writing for her favorite publications. LARG enjoys covering women’s topics, watching celebrities ...

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