Relationships

Guys Reveal How To Tell If He’s Actually Bad At Texting Or Just Doesn’t Want To Talk To You

by Annie Foskett

If you've ever online dated, dated a person with a cell phone, or simply lived in the 21st century, you have heard the excuse, "I'm bad at texting." Guys are stereotypically known to be the less communicative gender, both in person and via pocket technology. Dudes will like all of the memes on the toilet, but can't seem to find the time to text you back about where you are meeting for dinner.

As one who is actually pretty bad at texting — you can ask my dates, my friends, even my family — I do believe that some people are just better at crafting emoji-ridden quips than others. Or perhaps some people just have less lazy fingers.

If I'm ignoring a guy's texts, I might be preoccupied, and I might even take a day to reply, but he could still be my number one dude. I just suck at texting.

So is your guy really "bad at texting?"Is he legitimately terrible at remembering to text back like I am? Or is he lying to get out of replying to you?

According to the men of Reddit, it depends. If a guy isn't texting you back promptly and claims to be "bad at texting," chances are that he's not lying, he's just got something else going on. Here are some questions to ask yourself to figure this out:

Is his excuse legitimate? Like, is he at work?

That seems reasonable. It's hard to text from a meeting.

Did he reply letting you know he couldn't talk right now?

If he told you he would be off the grid, chances are he's just "bad at texting" right now.

Have you had a misunderstanding via text before?

This is an excuse not to text you back, but with good reason. If he's genuinely bad at conveying sarcasm via text (so hard) or if his texting tone has started fights in the past, he's probably trying to avoid conflict.

Does he normally text you, or does he usually wait to talk in person?

If your guy is saying something like this, but normally will text you all day, every day, pay attention. If email or phone calls are genuinely better for him, try that instead.

Does he usually have his phone out when you're with him?

If he's saying that he doesn't like texting, but is constantly on the phone when you are together, pay attention to his behavior. He may not be outright lying, but his excuse for not texting you seems less than legitimate.

If "being bad at texting" becomes a regular excuse for not replying to you, you have a right to bring it up. Ask your boo why he thinks he's bad at texting. He might have a good reason.

Dating coach John Keegan confirms that some guys just aren't that great at texting. However, if you are still having doubts about your man's lack of text-versation, ask yourself if he's showing up for you in real life. "Is he keeping his word? If he's being lax in other areas, then you know there is problem," says Keegan.

But rate of text response cannot be the end all, be all for your relationship if you are in a good partnership. "My main advice is to get off the text and get off of the technology," says Keegan. "Go out and spend time with the person that you want to spend time with."

Agreed. There are a million reasons he could be less chatty via text than you, but make sure you spend time in person. You know when a guy is into you, no matter how monosyllabic his texts are.

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