You're all settled in. You've had an average day, and you're ready to spend Valentine's night alone, watching rom-coms until you're nauseated enough to remember why you enjoy ridin' solo.
All of a sudden, just as the guy finally gets the girl -- but right before something tragic happens -- your phone buzzes. You roll your eyes, pause the movie and grab it.
Then, you immediately regret it. It's the ex.
We all have at least one. It's the ex who dumped you, only to come back approximately six months later, telling you how amazing you were and how dumb he or she was (and probably still is).
You stare at the screen for at least five minutes, wondering if you should respond, what this means and why he or she is thinking about you. But before you do anything rash, here are three things that should run through your mind:
1. Consider turning your phone off.
Turn your movie back on, go to bed and don't respond (if you choose to) until the next day. Or even the day after.
Holidays like Valentine's Day tend to make us especially nostalgic and lonely. Taking some time to mull it over so you don't instantly react will bring more peace to the situation.
2. Ask yourself, "How did this end?"
If it ended in screaming, jealously, distrust or anything of that nature, ignore the ex's text. It's not worth your time and internal bliss to go back to something filled with such negative memories.
If it ended for some other reason -- such as bad timing -- it might be worth a response. (Just remember to give it a day or two.)
3. Check in with yourself and see if you're ready and willing to revisit your ex emotionally and mentally.
If you're enjoying the single life, is it worth the possibility of emotional turmoil? No. It's not.
Are you ready to give yourself (and parts of your life) to someone else? If so, maybe it's a good time to re-engage with this person.
Despite what some may think, I don't believe it's good to hate your exes and completely write them off. Hate is too strong of an emotion, and it inhibits peace and productivity.
That being said, I also don't think you should invite negativity into your life. So, when you get the text from your ex, take a deep breath, go through these things in your mind and then go back to enjoying your rom-com-filled Valentine's Day.
