Relationships

5 Truths You Realize After Getting Your Heart Pissed On By Your Ex

by Jessica Wendroff

The saddest thing you’ll ever learn is how people can just fall out of love. It’s like watching a plane fall helplessly out of the sky.

The one person you thought would always be there for you suddenly just pulls away, without warning or reason.

Being rejected by the one you would do anything for, your best friend… there’s no pain like it in the world, yet there is still a light at the end of the tunnel your ex abandoned you in.

Although you may not be able to see it in the immediate throes of a breakup, losing the love of your life will actually bring some of your best qualities to the surface.

Losing the person you thought was your other half will show you how whole you really are. It’s not something you just wake up and realize; it’s a destination you come across after walking on glass for months.

Here are five truths you learn along the way after getting your heart pissed on by an ex:

You are f*cking amazing

Being with the wrong person for so long can really dull your shine, along with your self-esteem.

Some alone time can quickly polish your sense of independence and beauty. Maybe he or she never gave you any compliments or just mistreated you.

Being in a toxic situation for a long time can really get under your skin and stay there. You need to detox all of the bad vibes and dust off the entire situation to the best of your ability.

Once you do, you will soon realize you are beautiful and strong. Sometimes all you need is space and time with yourself to relearn this.

You are now an emotional hobo

Your comfort zone has kicked your ass to the curb.  You feel lost and alone.

A pulse was once your safety net, but now you’re homeless.  You don’t have a secure place to lay your head or heart anymore.

So you are forced to wander and find refuge in yourself, family, friends and anything that puts a smile on your pretty little face.

Find things to laugh about and surround yourself with positivity: uplifting quotes, music, optimistic people.

You can listen to sad songs for a little while, but then you should avoid them because they only re-open wounds.

Find a residence for your heart within yourself, and then make the people who actually love, respect and treasure you your neighbors. Learn to be happy alone, and learn what makes you happy.

In simplest terms, do you, Boo Boo.

It’s normal to be sad after a breakup… really, really sad

Once someone becomes an ex, you have to mourn him or her. This person will no longer be in your life, and it feels like an actual death has occurred.

You can’t reach out to an ex, so this person is practically no longer existent. It’s normal for the pain of this instance to sting every now and then.

Things will remind you of this person, but the agonizing pain will eventually fade.  The hurt is all a part of the process.

Growing pains don’t tickle, but they do subside.

You’ll either see a lot of movies… or genitalia

Depending on how you spend your time as a newly single person, you’ll most likely either spend it viewing massive amounts of movies or a plethora of penises (or vajayjays).

Some people like to go a little wild while others just want to chill and spend time improving their minds.

Others may explore a mix of the two or dive into hobbies. Whatever you decide to do, make sure to give yourself time to get back on your feet before you spread your legs.

When you truly are ready though, feel free to go forth and expand your mind, vagina/penis or both, as long as neither of the acts involve your ex.

Getting back together is not a good idea

Everyone knows this, but we just can’t help ourselves sometimes.

It’s natural to want to give a relationship another go once it ends. We all wish we could resuscitate love because it’s familiar, safe and more convenient than starting over with someone new.

Getting back together with an ex, however, is like resurrecting the dead: The act never works out well in horror movies, and the same holds true in real life.

Sometimes you are just forced to bury the living -- no matter how badly it hurts -- because the ex will never come back as the person you loved.

He or she may look the same and have a pulse, but trust me, the loving person who once inhabited that body is, sadly, dead and gone.

A hug from this person will feel like Mufasa’s lifeless arm comforting a crying Simba. Simply put, it’s not a good feeling, and you will feel even worse than before about the whole situation.

Say your goodbyes, and try your very best to accept that it’s over because at the end of the day, the relationship is out of your hands.

Don’t be discouraged, though. Healing takes time. You can’t reheat love, but you can get over it, and you will.

All in all, it sucks to realize people say things they don’t actually mean -- like “I love you.”  That’s not a phrase anyone should say lightly, but unfortunately, people do.

You find out your romantic love story is just that: a story. Fiction. A false hope.

Sometimes your “soulmate” is just a brown-eye in disguise, and the only thing real about the relationship was the ending.

It’s a hard pill to swallow, but once you rid yourself of the fantasy, you can create a relationship that is genuine. Perhaps all you need is that new beginning to achieve your happy ending.