Giving your man a handjob is a great way to add another fun activity to your sex life. It's not only reserved for young teenagers fooling around in the back of their cars.
A bit of handy work can be very welcomed by even the most experienced man. Thankfully, learning to give him a good handjob is super easy. Even better, it can be used as a great way to transition from kissing and foreplay to intercourse. So, until a robot with superior handjob skills replaces you, here are 11 different techniques on how to give a handjob:
1. Use a feather light touch.
A great handjob technique is using a feather light touch. It's a way to build up the tension. Plus, you might hurt your man if you start off stroking or twisting as hard and fast as possible right away. That would be comparable to him sticking a hand down there and rubbing your clit as hard and fast as he could right away, with no warming up. (Ouch.)
Start by just barely touching him. Run your fingers over his balls and penis. Then, transition to a soft massage. Err on the side of touching him too softly, instead of too hard in the beginning. Or hold his penis between the palms of your hands, and then roll your hands together.
But don't spend too much time being gentle. After a few minutes, all these soft handjob techniques could start to feel uncomfortable to a man. By a certain point, he's probably wishing you'd switch to gripping him more firmly already.
2. Wrap your fingers around his shaft.
This handjob technique is the easiest to do. It involves wrapping your fingers around his shaft, and then stroking up and down. Use a firm but gentle grip when you start moving your hand.
Similar to the way it feels when he's rubbing your clit, it's going to be the most pleasurable for him if you can keep a steady pace. If you're unsure of just how tightly to hold his penis or how much pressure to put on your grip, ask him to let you know if anything starts to feel uncomfortable.
3. Focus on his most sensitive spot.
A man's most sensitive spot is the head or tip of his penis, also known as the glans. This area is full of nerve endings.
So, a wonderful handjob will caress and touch this spot. Remember to be gentle here because this area is -- as I said -- sensitive. If you use too much pressure here, you might hurt your guy.
As I explain in this blowjob guide, another super sensitive spot is his frenulum. The frenulum is a ridge that runs along the whole underside of his penis. Massaging the frenulum with your fingers will feel really good to him.
4. Use lube.
Lubrication makes the handjob you're giving him feel so much better. You can start by using your saliva, which makes transitioning to a blowjob very easy, as you don't have to worry about potentially foul-tasting lube.
Besides your own saliva, water, oil and water-based lubes work great too. They provide different sensations.
Lube helps your hand slide and glide over his penis. If you'll be using lube for only a handjob (and not intercourse), then an oil-based lubricant is perfect. It won't dry up in the way water-based lubes can.
If you will be using the handjob as a prelude to intercourse, do not use an oil-based lube if you'll be using a condom because oil breaks down the latex.
5. Use both hands.
Most people usually think of using only one hand when they give a handjob, but you can also give one using two hands. Here are a few ways to use this handjob technique:
- Place one hand on the shaft of his penis, wrapping around it. Then, move it up and down. Place the other hand on the head of his penis by making an "O" shape with your forefinger and thumb. Twist this "O" shape around the head of his penis at the same time you're stroking his shaft.
- Another pleasurable handjob technique is using two hands and moving them in opposite directions. But you can also move them together in the same direction.
- A variation of this handjob technique is to put one hand on his penis, and the other hand on his balls. Remember to be gentler with his balls than you are with his shaft. You can cup his balls in your hand, or you can lightly squeeze them together.
6. Massage his perineum.
A man's perineum is the stretch of skin between his balls and his anus. This area has lots of nerve endings, and can feel very good when touched and massaged. Or, you can use the knuckle of your index finger to gently press into this area. (If you have long fingernails, it's probably a good idea to use your knuckle instead of your fingers.)
When you touch or massage his perineum, mix up how you touch him there, as well as the amount of pressure you use. Even something as simple as switching from clockwise circles to counterclockwise circles provides a nice bit of variation. The same goes for moving your fingers or your knuckle up and down.
7. Massage his prostate.
The prostate is referred to by many as the "man's G-spot." The way to get to the prostate is through the anus.
So, when your finger is around the area (but before penetration), ask your guy whether it's OK. Consider using fitted latex surgical gloves. When it's lubricated with a water-based lube, your finger will slide in easier.
Once you slowly glide your finger inside the anus, crook your finger upward and back toward his penis. You are looking for a roundish protrusion about the size of a walnut, and about 2 inches inside the rectum. Once you find the prostate, you can massage it. At the same time, you can keep stroking his penis, or he can stroke his penis while you massage his prostate.
8. Use varying amounts of pressure and speed.
Using the standard up-and-down stroking motion is good, but it can get kind of boring if that's all you're doing. Plus, if there is too much rough stimulation without any variation, his penis could become over-stimulated. That could make it feel numb.
Try starting slowly. Then, move faster as he gets more excited. You could also try starting with your thumb and forefinger only, gradually adding more fingers as you go along. You can use a twisting motion with your fist instead of only going straight up and down.
You can start with short strokes at the tip or at the base of his penis, and then make the strokes longer.
9. Transition to a blowjob.
A handjob can also be a great start before you give him a blowjob. Start by teasing him and massaging his balls through his pants. Then, pull down his pants and start stroking the shaft of his penis.
Since you're down on your knees, he's probably anticipating getting a blowjob. Make eye contact as you're giving him the handjob.
Keep your grip on his shaft, and start slowly sucking on the tip of his penis. Also use your tongue on the tip of his penis by curling it around and twisting it in circles. You can lick the tip of his penis as well. All the while, remember that you're still stroking the shaft.
You can also gently play with his balls with one hand, stroke his shaft with the other and suck or lick the tip of his penis with your mouth. He's sure to start getting really excited at this point. When he does, start stroking his penis harder. When he starts coming, just hold his penis (or let him hold it).
10. Loosen your grip when he's coming.
When he's about to come, loosen your grip until it's almost feather light. Also slow down. His penis will become extra sensitive during an orgasm, in the same way your clit does.
11. Use different positions.
You can position yourself in a variety of ways when you use these handjob tips. You and your man might be mutually masturbating each other. You might be lying on your side. This is a good position to give a handjob because you're mimicking the position he's in when he masturbates. Another good position is to stand behind him and reach around.
Try having him stand in front of you, and you can sit on the bed or on a chair. You can also be lying down as he straddles your stomach. He can lie down, and you can sit between his legs.
Learning how to give a great handjob is simple, and no sane man will refuse one. Some men even like them better than they like blowjobs (or they at least like the variation).
Ask him to show you how he masturbates. That way, you can see what he likes. Take note as to where he touches himself and the pace and pressure he uses. Then, imitate that. Remember that the base of the penis is not the most sensitive part. The tip is. Concentrate on that more than you concentrate on the base.
While I gave you lots of ideas, I just want to reiterate that it's usually best not to keep switching around to different handjob techniques. It's important to provide some consistency if you want to make your guy come while you're giving him a handjob.
While he's having fun, it should also make you feel good that you're making your man feel good. You can learn more powerful handjob techniques here.
