Relationships

Here's What You Should Do If Your Friends And Family Hate Your SO

by Jen Soule
Kayla Snell

Relationships are tough. They require hard work, compromise, and a lot of patience. For many people, this much effort will only apply to their romantic relationship.

So what happens when your outside relationships start to take just as much work because of the romantic one? What should you do when your friends and family hate your significant other? Ask yourself these questions to see if your relationship is really worth it.

1. Can I see myself in this relationship in a year, three years, or five years?

If you answered no, then there is no need to continue asking yourself any of these questions.  You should break up, cut your losses, and move on.

Relationships should be fun, exciting, and don't need to last a life time to be meaningful. But, if everyone in your life hates your significant other and you don't even see a future with them, what's the point in staying together? Salvage the relationships you do have with the people who you hope are in your life down the road.

2. Are you truly happy in this relationship, and is your life heading in the right direction?

Relationships should only add to your happiness, not be the sole reason for it.

If you remove this person from your life, how would you feel? Are you dedicating all your time and effort in to this relationship and neglecting all the other aspects of your life? If you are, it's probably a toxic one.

When you focus all your energy on one person, it's hard to step back and see if you are truly happy or if everyone around you is right to question the relationship. Start to work on yourself and what you want in life, and see if your relationship is holding you back in life or supporting you as you move forward.

3. Are you actually in love with with this person, or are you just comfortable?

This is huge. A lot of relationships last longer than they should because you get comfortable.

You know what to expect, you have a routine, and you don't have to worry about starting over. Being single can be scary, especially when you're not used to being alone. But, the longer you stay in a relationship you know isn't right, the harder it is to leave.  If you ask yourself if you're really in love with someone and the answer isn't an immediate and a firm yes, it may be time to re-evaluate your relationship status.

4. Do your friends and family have valid reasons for hating your SO, or is it "just because"?

It's not unheard of for friends and family to dislike a new boyfriend or girlfriend "just because". If you see your friend a little less because they're in a new relationship, it can be frustrating and the easiest person to blame is the new person in the equation. These feelings will pass with time, but if the hatred continues, you may want to think about the reasons.

Consider how your boyfriend or girlfriend treats your friends and family.  They don't have to be friends, but at least having a foundation of mutual respect will go a long way.  If you're constantly making excuses for your boyfriend or girlfriend's behavior, then it's likely that you're too deep in the relationship to see the situation clearly from both sides.

5. Is the relationship worth losing any of the other people in your life?

You don't want to look back and think about all the people you lost because of someone you later realized was a waste of time. Relationships can make us blind to the rest of the world, so take a step back and picture your life without your SO. Now step back and picture your life without some of your friends and family. Both scenarios will be hard to think about, but if you can't mend the relationships, it's easier to make the choice for yourself than to have your significant other or friends and family choose for you.