Relationships

What It Means To Regularly Have Dreams About Cheating On Your Boyfriend

by Candice Jalili

This week, we have Jennifer* who regularly dreams about cheating on her loving boyfriend:

So this is the third or forth time I've had this dream. I'm currently in a very loving relationship of almost a year, but I dream that I cheat on my boyfriend with various men. In some of the dreams, I cheat with an ex; in others, I cheat with random men I think are hot, whom I met on a dating app or at a bar. In the dreams, I also always convince myself that kissing/having sex/whatever I'm doing with another guy is NOT cheating... even though, in the back of my mind, I know it is. WHAT DOES THIS MEAN SOS!?!?

Here's Lauri's interpretation:

Before we tackle the juicy details, let's start with the fact that, in the dream, you are trying to convince yourself that you aren't cheating. Remember, dreams are a conversation with the self, about the self. In real life, what is it you are trying to convince yourself of lately that you know isn't true? What inner dialogue have you been having with yourself that seems similar to the inner dialogue you had in this dream? It is going to be connected to a waking life issue that began around the same time this dream began. And it most likely has to do with your relationship.
Remember, dreams are a conversation with the self, about the self.
Now, as for the cheating aspect of these dreams, it's important to keep in mind that this is symbolic of something else and is in no way an indication that you are a trashy, little harlot!
It does, however, indicate there is something you are feeling guilty about. In most cases, cheating dreams are caused by someone in the relationship giving too much time and attention to something, which causes the other to feel left out. Are you spending too much time at work, with friends or on some project or goal that might be taking time or focus away from your boyfriend? And if so, are you justifying it to yourself? Ask yourself what you are doing that might be causing your boyfriend to feel 'cheated' out of his time with you. Whatever the case, I believe the ex in your dream might serve as a warning that you could be falling into another pattern that will lead to your current boyfriend becoming an ex as well. When you are able to pinpoint it, you need to change it so that the dreams will stop.

I'm going to go ahead and guess that Jennifer doesn't want her loving boyfriend turning into an ex anytime soon, so I would strongly suggest doing some deep soul-searching to figure out what the root cause of these dreams could possibly be.

Sure, it's a little scary admitting there's a problem in your relationship, but at least the dreams are serving as a warning to help you deal with the problem before it gets out of hand.

I hope this was helpful to Jennifer and anyone else who may have had a similar dream!

*Name has been changed.