Men Reveal The Ridiculous Things They Wish You Did While You Orgasmed

There can be a lot of performance anxiety when it comes to sex. The pressure to be confident but excitable, dominant but submissive or loving but kinky can sometimes be overwhelming.

Plus, like, you guys, what about the big "O" moment?!? For the love of God, how should we all handle THE BIG "O" MOMENT?

We can't all sing like a freaking bird or ensure we whip out a perfect blue steel face.

It also turns out men have their own wants and expectations from women during the big "O" moment, and LADIES, THIS SHIT CRAY.

A Reddit user asked the question, "What do you want a woman to do as she orgasms?" and boy, the men of the internet DID NOT disappoint.

Here, men reveal their orgasm hopes and dreams, which range from hilarious to ridiculous to flat-out impossible. (Word to the wise: Don't take this stuff too seriously.)

Some guys' wishes require her to take a few Rosetta Stone language lessons.

Or they require her to develop superpowers, like extreme strength.

A LOT of their hopes and dreams involve yelling some pretty, uh, interesting stuff...

...like, a lot of yelling.

Some guys are really asking way too much from a female orgasm...

...whereas others have more creative — albeit specific — ideas I can sort of get into.

At the end of the day, ladies, we can only do so much. This guy can go save the world himself.

Geez. And men say WE'RE the needy, confusing and demanding ones.

Ladies, your orgasm is a unique snowflake. Don't change a damn thing.