Relationships

The Average Amount Of Times You'll Have Sex Before You Die Will Depress You

by Hope Schreiber
Thais Ramos Varela

If you're not comparing your love life to others, then how would you know that yours isn't that great?

This is why studies like these exist. We crave to know we're having more sex than the average person.

Thanks to a website called Qudico, we now know that number -- and it may depress you.

According to their numbers, the average person will have sex a grand total of 5,778 times before they die.

This is crazy because I've had... zero. I've had zero sex in my life. Honestly, I couldn't give it away at this point.

The study also found that people fall in love 6.5 times in their life and will, on average, have eight romantic partners.

That's right, only eight people, on average, will let you see their naughty bits.

It goes on to suggest people are dumped 5.5 times in their lifetimes, which seems REAL LOW to me, am I right, guys? ...Guys?

According to Huffington Post, we will also have six unrequited loves in our lifetime. This may be the saddest "fun fact" of all...

If you're nowhere near 5,778 yet, have no fear. Sex actually gets better for women when they enter middle age.

Yeah, look at your 40-something coworker with a little respect, okay?

Lead author of the study Dr. Holly Thomas said,

We were surprised to find a group of women who said that sex actually gets better for them as they got older. As doctors we were assuming that sex gets worse for women.

Why would they assume that? Because being a woman actually sucks?

Sex probably gets better for women with age because they know their bodies better and know how to communicate what they want in the bedroom better, too.

But if we do the math... 5,778 times with eight partners means 722 times per person.

Feel free to use this as an excuse to hook up tonight -- you're just trying to meet your quota.

Citations: Here's How Many Times The Average Person Will Have Sex (And With How Many Partners) In Their Lifetime (Bro Bible)