Bondage, BDSM, S&M – whatever you want to call it, this debaucherous trend has become mainstream ever since the worldwide success of "Fifty Shades of Grey." After that book launched, everyone’s girlfriend, sister and even mother has felt okay to admit that sometimes they enjoy a bit of a spanking or being tied up.
There has also been a flood of new BDSM clubs that have opened up, also an upcoming film "Kink" directed by James Franco (seriously, what DOESN’T James Franco do anymore?) and even the students of Harvard have jumped on the bandwagon with the emergence of a Harvard Munch Club – a club focusing on kinky interests.
I’ve been a huge advocate of BDSM for as long as I can remember – but for all you beginners out there, here are a few tips and tricks for you to engage in bondage without freaking out your girl too much:
Spanking
Spanking is an easy way to introduce the concept of bondage – while you’re banging her doggy style, just casually slap her ass mid thrust. If she acts shocked and disgusted, you can pretend that your hand slipped and resume pumping.
If you see a naughty smile on her face, continue with the spanking – although please do keep in mind that you are much stronger than you realize, and she does need to sit down at work tomorrow. Nothing is more awkward than walking into your office with a hemorrhoid pillow when you don’t have hemorrhoids.
Slapping
While I enjoy some occasional face slapping, this one is difficult for a lot of men to engage in because men are generally taught not to hit women.
I’ve had a lot of men flinch when I ask them to hit me in the face, but a good way around this is to think of someone who really pisses you off – be it your boss, your father or that bitch who told everyone about your premature ejaculation problem. Slapping will come naturally to you in no time at all – but don’t slap her so hard as to leave a mark. After all, her face is her money maker (I hope).
Tied Up
No girl is going to let you tie her up unless she trusts you completely – so try to veer away from suggesting rope play with a random one-night stand; she’ll most likely freak out and run out the door faster than you can get a hardon.
She needs to be sure that you’re not going to tie her up and then leave her to make yourself a sandwich or watch the rest of that Knicks game you DVRed – or worst still, hog tie her to the bed and then snap pictures of her to show your drinking buddies. Be respectful and at least make her a sandwich too.
Capitalize on the fact that she trusts you enough to let you tie her up – don’t f*ck it up by making her deep throat you or slap her in the face with your cock – unless she asked for it.
Safe Word
Before you engage in any kind of bondage or BDSM play, always, always agree on a safe word. A safeword makes it possible for a submissive to say stop or no more when it all becomes too much for her to handle. When picking a safe word, try not to veer towards anything that you scream out too often while having sex. A good safeword for me is panda – because really, why would I ever say that during normal sex?
If your girl wants to go a little more hardcore and is bound and gagged, make sure you introduce a safe signal. It could be snapping of the fingers or a certain number of grunts as a pre-defined signal to stop.
Always keep in mind that while bondage and BDSM are great ways to spice up your sex life, there is a very fine line between dominated and being humiliated. So if you want her to continue playing the submissive, make sure you don’t cross the line. Or just buy her some jewelry afterwards to shut her up.
The Trophy Wife | Elite. @_Trophy_Wife www.LifeofaTrophyWife.com
