Relationships

What I Would Say To The Man Who Hurt Me, But Didn't Break Me

by Dana Shirley

Congratu -- f*cking -- lations.

You win.

Is that what you’ve been waiting to hear?

I’ll admit to it. You brought me up only to bring me down farther than I'd ever imagined.

I didn’t think I’d be able to pick myself back up.

There were endless nights where I cried myself to sleep.

Does it make you happy knowing that?

You brought out extremely ugly sides to me, which I didn’t even know existed before I met you.

You manipulated me into thinking I was messing up our relationship and was the worst girl in the world. But truth be told, that was all you.

At one point when you left, I thought my world was ending.

It was a long journey, until I realized my world was just beginning.

Because here’s the thing: You’re a f*ckboy.

No girl wants that. I can guarantee you of that.

You let the one person who actually gave a crap about you down and walked away from the best thing that's ever happened to you.

It took being broken for me to understand my life was just starting.

I now understand what hitting rock bottom feels like, and now that I’m on top of the world, I wouldn’t take it back.

I have goals. Meanwhile, you have no college degree and live with your parents.

Good for you.

I’m not a bad person.

Don’t get me wrong; I have my fair share of flaws, and I’ll admit to that.

I’m emotional and sensitive, but you’ll never find someone who loves you the way I once did.

I would’ve done anything for you, but you made the decision to push me too far.

I don’t hate you and I’d never wish anything bad on you, but I also never care to speak to you again.

The feelings that were once so strong are now long gone.

You have left a scar on me, but scars fade with time. When I have a man who is deserving of my love and attention, I won’t once look back on the memories we had.

You need to learn to grow up. Your 20s are supposed to be fun, but you haven’t matured a bit.

It’s quite pathetic, actually. I almost feel bad for you. Almost.

I never needed you the way I thought I did and I’m proud of who I am. I know it’s not because of you.

No matter the length of time you were in my life -- whether it was months or years -- your impact on me has changed me, in some bad ways and some good ways.

Unfortunately, I come with baggage now.

But that’s okay because I want someone who accepts me for who I am in every sense, not the way you only accepted the aspects of me you liked.

No one is perfect and neither are you, but you never took the time to truly understand why I am the way I am.

Take a look in the mirror because you have plenty of qualities you should improve on. You should start by being nice.

I decided to take the high road and be the bigger person. I walked away from someone who no longer served a positive purpose in my life.

Although you broke me, I’m standing tall with my head held high.

I’ll admit it took longer than I expected, but I did it.

I’m not thankful for how you treated me. But I’m thankful for the fact that you made me realize I deserve so much more than what you offered (which wasn’t much).

So, here’s to the next chapter. This one is closed.