Kendall Jenner's Playlist For 'Mom Car' Range Rover Includes A Terror Jr Jam
Who's ready to read deeply into a Spotify playlist and find meaning in the mundane?
All of us, right? Because we don't have lives? Because we live to create drama where there is none?
Kendall Jenner shared her ~Range Rover ~ playlist and there are some very interesting selections on there, people.
On her app, the 21-year-old told fans,
I consider [the Range Rover] my 'mom car,' so I play a totally random mix. It's mostly newer stuff in the background when I'm cruising with a bunch of friends.
Kenny shared 10 picks, and while some were pretty benign, others gon' make you go:
Thank you, "RuPaul's Drag Race" season five contestant Detox. Your face speaks volumes.
1. “33 'GOD'” by Bon Iver
Bon Iver, led by Justin Vernon — a longtime collaborator of Kendall's brother-in-law Kanye West — released their third studio album in September, just in time for cry-in-the-dark season.
This song is just plain ol' beautiful.
SHADE LEVEL: 0/5 Detoxs
2. “Life Round Here” by James Blake
Kenny is easily the most secretive of the Kardashian clan when it comes to her dating life, and this song might be a rare nugget of insight into her brief romances.
She's been linked to stars like Justin Bieber, Harry Styles and A$AP Rocky, but never for long before the stories disappear from the internet and our short-term memories.
Lyrics like those in “Life Round Here” may reflect Kendall's boy dramz:
Part time love is life round here We never done Everything feels like touchdown on a rainy day Part time love is life round here We never done Now we're at square one And we waited too long So we're back to square one
SHADE LEVEL: 2/5 Detoxs
3. “Side To Side” by Ariana Grande feat. Nicki Minaj
Ari and Kendall aren't exactly best pals by any stretch, but their paths do cross occasionally.
Ariana was famously wing-slapped at the 2014 Victoria's Secret Fashion Show, but not by Kendall.
In fact, Kendall didn't even join the VSFS crew until 2015, so they remain on solid ground.
Also, no one in their right mind creates a cruisin' playlist and excludes the song that brought the term “dick bicycle” to prominence.
SHADE LEVEL: 1/5 Detoxs
4. “My Way” by Calvin Harris
FACT: NO ONE CAN EVER ENJOY A CALVIN HARRIS SONG EVER AGAIN WITHOUT SHADING TAYLOR SWIFT.
Kendall and Taylor share an ex in Harry Styles which, despite it being ancient history, is enough to bring this GIF back for emphasis:
SHADE LEVEL: 3/5 Detoxs
5. “The Less I Know The Better” by Tame Impala
This song rules and served as the soundtrack for a sweaty summer 2016, but it doesn't seem to allude to any of Kendall's personal drama.
The music video does feature actress Laia Manzanares — an honest-to-goodness Sissy Spacek throwback — getting sexy with a gorilla named Trevor. So, take what you will from that.
SHADE LEVEL: 0/5 Detoxs
6. “Come First” by Terror Jr
I MEAN, COME ON.
Terror Jr is a band shrouded in goddamn mystery, yet the group hasn't been able to drop one single without Twitter erupting in screams of “KYLIE JENNER HAS A SECRET MUSIC CAREER!”
The public's steadfast belief Kylie's alter-ego is, in fact, TJ front woman Lisa Terror makes “Come First” Kendall's shadiest selection on the playlist thus far.
Is Kendall confirming Kylie's involvement? Just SAY IT, Jenners!
SHADE LEVEL: 5/5 Detoxs
7. “24K Magic” by Bruno Mars
The idea of anyone listening to Bruno Mars without being forced to do so for torture or interrogation purposes is so bewildering I can't even assess this selection properly.
SHADE LEVEL: N/A
8. “Fix You” by Coldplay
Alright, everyone knows Coldplay can go choke on Chris Martin's decorative arm bands, but who among us hasn't, in a moment of weakness, listened to “Fix You” while saying a silent prayer for Kendall's brother Rob Kardashian?
Lights may never guide Rob home or ignite his bones, but America will never stop trying to fix him.
SHADE LEVEL: 4/5 gentle, loving Detoxs
9. “Starboy” by The Weeknd feat. Daft Punk
This is a delicious shade sandwich, so wash up! Lunch is served.
Sisters Gigi and Bella Hadid share Kendall's love of being incredibly gorgeous/selling underwear, so it's no surprise she has basically disowned her own reality TV family in favor of theirs at this point.
Bella famously dated The Weeknd, aka Abel Tesfaye, until very recently.
Though the two remain on good terms, lyrics like, “Cut that ivory into skinny pieces/ then she clean it with her face/man I love my baby,” lead many of us to wonder just how many… uh… ski trips these model besties take on a regular basis.
SHADE LEVEL: 5/5 Detoxs
10. “Nights” by Frank Ocean
Frank Ocean is a precious treasure crafted from the tears of Baby Jesus and the warm embrace of Aphrodite herself. Kendall's entire playlist should have just been “Blond” on repeat.
SHADE LEVEL: 0/5 Detoxs
Hear Kendall's playlist in full below:
Citations: KendallJ.com
